She Made Me Angry! Really?
It can be truly shocking to realize that our mind is the ONLY obstacle to our inner peace, well being, happiness and success in life. If the majority of us fully understood this, we'd be living in a radically different world. Our current world reinforces the belief that things and people "out there" have power over us and they "make us feel" a certain way that keeps us trapped and powerless. But do things "out there" really have the power to "make us" feel anything without our consent? Let's explore this.
Believed Thoughts Change Your Body Chemistry
Happiness or unhappiness originate in the mind. It all starts with a thought, a story or a belief that we either accept as "truth" or reject. Every thought we believe - whether it's helpful or stressful, acts just like a hypnotizing spell. For every single thought believed, the body creates corresponding physical sensations of comfort or discomfort. A fearful thought will trigger contraction, tension, rigidity or loss of energy in the body. On the other hand, a loving thought will instantly create a state of harmony, flow and well being in the body.
Physical Sensations Are Expressed Externally As Emotions, then Behaviors
When our body sensations of comfort or discomfort become very strong - sometimes overwhelming - we release this "energy in motion" (e-motion) as emotions that are always expressed externally via our body language. We may decide to act on these emotions with behaviors. Remember, a single thought that we believe triggers the following chain reaction:
- Believed thought / Corresponding physical sensations of comfort or discomfort / Emotion / Behavior.
Others Don't Have the Power to Make Us Feel Anything!
Without that prior conscious thought (or subconscious memory) that is assumed to be true, there can be no feelings, emotions or behaviors. If others can't control which thoughts we will accept or reject as untruthful - which will prevent the emotional chain reaction from happening, then we can logically conclude that others don't have the power to make us feel anything. Of course, mastering our mind is a skill that requires discipline, practice, self-awareness and knowledge.
Time For Accountability! Happiness or Unhappiness Originate in the Mind
Once we understand how our own brains and bodies work, we become fully accountable for the way we think, feel and act. Imagine if everyone became accountable this way! There would be no more blaming others for the way WE feel. We would no longer feel victimized or powerless about our state of mind, our rage, our depression or our anxiety. This is very good news! Our happiness or unhappiness originate in the mind, which means we've always had the power to control how we respond to all the unpredictable things life will continue to throw our way. Will we be able to gracefully accept "what is" in this moment? - which doesn't prevent us from taking action in the next moment, or will we believe resistant, angry, hopeless thoughts that argue with what has already happened? Stressful, resentful thoughts will raise our discomfort level, drain our energy and darken our mood. Will this help us to get what we want in the end?
Don't Underestimate the Power of Your Subconscious Mind!
Not only do our thoughts directly change how we feel and perceive the world, they also have enormous creative power in our lives. Maybe you've heard the accurate saying "thoughts become things"? There is a simple explanation for this. The thoughts we accept as true with our conscious mind become deep seated-beliefs that get stored in our subconscious mind. If only we realized the extent to which our subconscious programming is driving our actions, behaviors, beliefs and expectations! If only we could see the direct relationship between most of our life circumstances and what our subconscious has accepted as truth or facts!
We Are Our Own Worst Enemies
Day by day, the negative, stressful thoughts we believe without questioning insidiously slip into our subconscious mind and then we wonder why we constantly sabotage ourselves and experience less than desirable outcomes. We are our own worst enemies because we constantly underestimate how incredibly powerful our mind is! Our negative self-talk is extremely toxic and destructive! It changes our body chemistry, our mood, our behaviors, and it may very well end up as a permanent program lodged in our subconscious that can impact us for life!
If You Don't Believe Me, Try This...
Are our kids aware of the power of their thoughts and beliefs? Have they ever been educated about the constant mental chatter going on in their minds? Do they know that their thoughts are not facts, and most thoughts should not be believed? We truly have no idea how powerful our mind is! If we did, we would make a conscious effort to use it constructively and we would be blown away by the results. If you don't believe me, try reprogramming your subconscious with words like "joy, peace, vitality, health, wealth, success, love, harmony...etc." right before you fall asleep at night and immediately as you are waking up. Simply say these words to yourself for the next two weeks and see what happens! I dare you.
You've Had The Power All Along...
Once you master your own mind, you also master your body, your emotions, your perceptions, your (re)actions and you will have more control over many of your external circumstances that are largely influenced by your subconscious beliefs. If mastering your own mind is not the most effective, direct path to a happy, empowered, successful life, then what is? It's time to stop looking for answers "out there" and instead, look "in here".
How Can We Learn To Master Our Minds?
I believe this is THE most important thing we should be teaching our children (and ourselves). It's not that hard to learn, it just takes a little practice. I have written a complete manual for kids that teaches the following steps to self-mastery in a simple, gradual way through short stories and fun activities (Wise Willy's Secret Manual To Become a Mindful Superhero):
1) Become aware of your thoughts (mental chatter)
2) Become aware of your body sensations
3) Understand the relationship between thoughts, body sensations, emotions, behaviors and perception
4) Understand how your brain and body work (rational brain, emotional brain, emotions)
5) Develop self-awareness of your thoughts and feelings
6) Increase your tolerance for discomfort
7) Learn how to question your stressful thoughts, release uncomfortable feelings appropriately and self-regulate your moods.
8) Use your focus to harness the incredible power of your conscious and subconscious mind.
New Printable Mindfulness & Emotional Intelligence Cards!
I have recently created 40 printable mindfulness and emotional intelligence cards from Wise Willy's Secret Manual that are great reminders for daily practice. Thanks for taking the time to read!
Lise Villeneuve
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