5 Life Hacks I Secretly Experienced in Cuba

Photo credit: Yvon Loiselle

I was recently in Holguin, Cuba, with a small group. I left Edmonton feeling tired, stressed and in need of some serious physical rejuvenation. I returned home after one week in Cuba feeling like a kid on Christmas morning! It's been over three weeks since my return and I can still feel the positive effects from this trip of a lifetime!

What was it about this trip that made it so special? I've been to Cuba many times before and have travelled all over the world, but there was something uniquely different and refreshing about my recent experience in Holguin. It's no mystery actually. This trip was extraordinary because of the wonderful, spontaneous, crazy, hilarious, generous, brilliant friends I was so fortunate to travel with. The chemistry in our group was deliciously electrifying! Every day was a sweet fiesta, and I have to mention that nobody in our group drank alcohol -except for me, I like the occasional cold cerveza.

I had SO much fun, and I also had realizations that deepened the sense of peace and contentment I still feel from this unforgettable trip. Charles, Catherine, Yvon, Nadia...here are the five life hacks I secretly experienced in Cuba:

Number 5:
I really enjoyed our little stretching and mindfulness sessions by the beach, but my experience was that mindfulness doesn't have to be done formally to be effective. It can be your little secret. During the entire trip, I was practising mindfulness for a few minutes here and there. I felt deep gratitude every time I saw a bird, a flower, a butterfly, the gorgeous ocean or when the breeze caressed my skin. I'm sure you all did too, right? I mean, it was difficult NOT to find a reason to be grateful in this paradise. It may sound silly to even mention, because gratitude comes so naturally when we immerse ourselves in something different and special. The trick is to keep it up every day, especially when we are back in our routines at home, because an attitude of gratitude radically changes our perception, alters our brain and enhances our mood. Now that I have experienced the sublime power of gratitude in Cuba, I am reminded to keep practising it at home. After more than three weeks, I still feel like I'm on fire (in a good way, not talking about inflammation here :)

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Photo credit: Catherine Kubash

Here's another little secret. Every time I walked down that cobblestone path that led to the beach, I breathed deeply, one step at a time. I felt the heat under my bare feet, and I noticed what I was feeling and thinking. Nobody had to know I was doing a "micro-meditation," I was simply bringing my awareness into my body in the present moment. I also did this while snorkeling, eating and floating in the pool. Back at home, I do this while I'm doing the dishes, gardening, walking...etc. No need to sit quietly on a cushion in a dark room. Life offers endless opportunities to practice mindfulness in a way that is integrated to our everyday activities. I think it's even more effective this way.

Photo credit: Lise Villeneuve

Number 4:
It was my experience that taking good care of the body (regular movement, eating well, sweating a lot and drinking gallons of water) allowed me to really feel grounded in my physical vessel. It may sound obvious, but sometimes I have a tendency to be more in my head and less in touch with the body. This very embodied awareness I felt in Cuba made it easier for me to physically feel and release any passing emotions that wanted to arise. As a result of this practice of letting go of old emotional "stuff", the mind quickly became a lot quieter and peaceful. I remember just sitting on the beach one morning, feeling overwhelmed by this strong wave of gratitude. I felt the emotion move through me and it spontaneously moved out as tears. There was no hesitation or resistance. I felt absolute peace. At home, I am reminded of the importance of daily physical movement to feel fully grounded in my body. This really does make a huge difference in our physical and emotional well being.

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Number 3:
I realized that from this place of grounded presence in my own body, it became a lot easier to remain aware of the stressful thoughts that inevitably came up now and then. In a state of embodied awareness, I found that it was much easier to question the validity of my stressful thoughts and, more importantly, to be able to notice the immediate negative impact these thoughts had on my body (contraction, heaviness, rigidity, lethargy). The connection between thoughts, the body and emotions became crystal clear to me and any emotional tension could be spontaneously released through this awareness. The result of this was a lot more energy because emotions were not being repressed or suppressed in the body. At home, I am reminded to question my thinking anytime I start to feel physical tension or contraction.

Number 2:
Hanging out with this bunch of clowns in Cuba, I was reminded that no matter how mature or refined we think we are, we are all children at heart. We should give ourselves permission to sing, dance, play, laugh our butts off and enjoy life. Every. Single. Day. Not just on special occasions. Once we start allowing ourselves to shamelessly express our joy again (like we spontaneously did when we were little), we realize how naturally intoxicating it feels to be fully alive! Why the heck do we cut ourselves off from our own passion and playfulness? Yvon, Nadia, Catherine, Charles: you could give seminars on how to unleash the inner-child. I laughed so hard it hurt. At home, I am reminded to live joyfully from the heart, to follow my creative impulses (no matter how embarrassing that may look), and to seek the company of people who are not afraid to live fiercely and freely.

Photo credit: Yvon Loiselle

Number 1:
To quote one of my very favourite authors, Dr. David Hawkins: "Nothing in the universe happens by chance or accident. The universe is a coherent concurrence and interaction of innumerable conditions attendant on the infinite number of energy patterns."

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

I believe everything we experience serves our evolution. Everyone we meet is our teacher and our mirror. I don't think we have as much control over "our" life as we think we do, so we might as well enjoy the ride! Worrying is a waste of time anyway. All this to say that this experience was perfect in every way. Catherine, Charles, Yvon, Nadia: is it just me, or do you also feel like this trip was meant to be? I feel like my heart was broken wide open. Gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. A quand le prochain voyage?

Warmly,

Lise Villeneuve
Mindfulness Teacher
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Things I Wish I Knew: The Paradox of Pain

Things I Wish I Knew:The Paradox of Pain

I wasn’t consciously aware of it, but I have been searching my entire life for something I only recently discovered. How different things could have been had I known this earlier on! So much unnecessary suffering could have been avoided. I wasn’t even aware that I was trying to escape my pain at any cost.

Just Fitting In

Like everyone else around me, I was just doing whatever I could to avoid feeling those queasy, raw, edgy feelings of discomfort whenever they showed up. Denial, projection, repression and suppression were my strategies of choice to run away and escape from those negative feelings. I kept myself as busy and distracted as I possibly could in order to ignore or numb the underlying pain. I was fortunate enough to have a fairly normal childhood with no major trauma, yet the pain had been building up over the years, simply as a condition of living in a world that encourages and rewards disowning and projecting our negative feelings onto others.

What Problem?

Since I didn’t even know there was a problem - this denied pain I was carrying around everywhere was preventing me from experiencing true joy and inner peace - how was I to know there was a solution that could dramatically improve my quality of life? Why wasn’t I taught this simple solution in elementary school, or in University, when I got my psychology degree? Maybe it was best that I discover these things on my own, when I was ready to truly hear them. After all, I believe everything in this universe unfolds in perfect divine order. My journey into the heart of consciousness has allowed me to grow, to unlearn and to peel off many of the layers of protection I had built around myself. Now, I am happy to be able to share what I have discovered with others. And what is that?

The Exact Opposite Of What We Do

The pathway to true freedom and inner peace is so simple, yet it is counterintuitive and rather uncomfortable. We are all wired to seek pleasure and to avoid pain. Evolutionarily, this has ensured our survival. However, we are now at a stage in our evolution that allows us to soar beyond mere survival. Now more than ever before, we have the potential to thrive. We can reach levels of bliss that allow us to transcend the drama and suffering of this world. But for that, we have to stop running from our pain. There is no other way around it. We have to willingly welcome our pain and then let it go. We can learn to see pain for what it is – trapped emotions from our past – not who we are.

Breaking Free

As unpleasant and challenging as it may appear, we can all find the courage to face those uncomfortable feelings that make us squirm, hide, run, blame, judge, and sabotage ourselves. Once we become aware of the many avoidance behaviors or crutches we desperately cling to in order to push the pain away (keeping busy, alcohol, food, sex, television, isolation, projection onto others...etc), we can start to crack the walls of the prison that has been keeping our pain inside all these years. We can stop reacting to life from a place of fear and instead start to see our triggers as opportunities, or invitations to actively release the hurt we have been carrying inside for too long.

Run, Forrest, Run!

So when that queasy, edgy feeling returns, we can stay present with it instead of trying to make it go away. We can observe what’s happening inside our body and let the emotions come out instead of running from them, or demanding that people or circumstances stop poking us where it hurts. Once the negative feelings have been released and we feel ok again inside, all our energy becomes available for problem solving, for simply enjoying the moment or for actively creating the reality we choose.

Healing From The Inside Out

It takes a while to get used to it, but this process of facing and surrendering our pain can be embraced daily. At first it might feel strange and terrifying, but as you keep releasing the negative feelings and then consciously refocus attention on positive things that allow you to feel good, you will heal your life from the inside out. When we are brave enough to face our pain, we eventually become fearless. When we are fearless, all the boundaries and limits we set around ourselves crumble. Paradoxically, fully feeling and releasing our pain is the quickest way to end our individual and collective suffering.

So there you have it. Now I know... and so do you! Thanks for having taken the time to read!

With Love,

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

What A Crappy Morning...Literally!

I didn't get much sleep last night. I was woken up by a mysterious crash at about 3am (probably the cats having another wild shooter party on top of the China cabinet.) Anyway, I couldn't get back to sleep until about 7am, and when Theo pulled me out of a very strange dream, the first thing he said to me was "Emma says something's wrong with the toilet." I just figured the chain was tangled or something minor like that, until I pulled open my drapes and saw the sewer truck working in our back alley. Oh-oh. When I opened my bedroom door, I was greeted with a real, genuine, overwhelming smell of 'eau-de-toilette' that permeated the entire house.

The bathroom door was closed by the time I got to it, Emma had made it "off limits." I peeked inside, only to find dirty toilet water sprayed everywhere. Yuck! (and the seat was down!) What made it even worse was that my bladder was about to explode. I checked the bathroom in the basement and it was the same scene. Yucky sewer water everywhere. Crappy. Crappy, crappy, crappy. We've had a similar issue in the past, the sewer line workers are required to use low pressure. But they obviously didn't!

I called the city and they told me someone would call me back...eventually. So I shamelessly went out to the truck in the alley (yes, in my pajamas, with my dragon breath and crazy morning hair) and told the workers about the pleasant situation in our house. Yup, I told them "my house smells like s**t, my toilets are overflowing, and I need coffee. Now." Well, maybe I didn't use those exact words, but all they could say was "sorry."

So back to the house I went, knowing that it was going to be one of those days. There was breakfast to prepare, I had to get the kids started on their schoolwork (we homeschool), Emma had her first Musical Theatre class in a few hours, I still had to pee and the house was a smelly disaster. Then the city called back to say "sorry". I told them I would send them the cleaning bill. Of course, that means filling in a damage claim form, yadiyadiyada. I probably looked a little bit like the woman in this picture (with worse hair, pajamas and a fuller bladder).

But then something in my brain happened. That's quite surprising pre-coffee. I remembered a particular mindfulness card that I had written and included in my deck of 56 cards just a few weeks ago. Yup, those cards are back to haunt me. This one basically said "if you can't change a situation, you might as well relax and surrrender." I took a deep breath and just let go of the anger, the frustration and the stress. Then I smiled to myself, thinking that if the damage claim goes through, at least I will have started my day by making $100 for washing the bathrooms. Not bad, right?

The whole ordeal was stressful, but somehow, we got everything done. The kids ate their breakfast on the front step -where at least it didn't smell like a sewer- while I pulled out the sexy latex gloves. Emma and Theo promptly did all their schoolwork, I sent in the damage claim, and we even made it to Musical Theatre class on time. The only thing missing was my coffee, which I got to enjoy even more than usual later in the day. Did I mention how sparkling our bathrooms are now?

All the best,

Lise Villeneuve
Creator of Conscious Kids
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