5 Life Hacks I Secretly Experienced in Cuba

Photo credit: Yvon Loiselle

I was recently in Holguin, Cuba, with a small group. I left Edmonton feeling tired, stressed and in need of some serious physical rejuvenation. I returned home after one week in Cuba feeling like a kid on Christmas morning! It's been over three weeks since my return and I can still feel the positive effects from this trip of a lifetime!

What was it about this trip that made it so special? I've been to Cuba many times before and have travelled all over the world, but there was something uniquely different and refreshing about my recent experience in Holguin. It's no mystery actually. This trip was extraordinary because of the wonderful, spontaneous, crazy, hilarious, generous, brilliant friends I was so fortunate to travel with. The chemistry in our group was deliciously electrifying! Every day was a sweet fiesta, and I have to mention that nobody in our group drank alcohol -except for me, I like the occasional cold cerveza.

I had SO much fun, and I also had realizations that deepened the sense of peace and contentment I still feel from this unforgettable trip. Charles, Catherine, Yvon, Nadia...here are the five life hacks I secretly experienced in Cuba:

Number 5:
I really enjoyed our little stretching and mindfulness sessions by the beach, but my experience was that mindfulness doesn't have to be done formally to be effective. It can be your little secret. During the entire trip, I was practising mindfulness for a few minutes here and there. I felt deep gratitude every time I saw a bird, a flower, a butterfly, the gorgeous ocean or when the breeze caressed my skin. I'm sure you all did too, right? I mean, it was difficult NOT to find a reason to be grateful in this paradise. It may sound silly to even mention, because gratitude comes so naturally when we immerse ourselves in something different and special. The trick is to keep it up every day, especially when we are back in our routines at home, because an attitude of gratitude radically changes our perception, alters our brain and enhances our mood. Now that I have experienced the sublime power of gratitude in Cuba, I am reminded to keep practising it at home. After more than three weeks, I still feel like I'm on fire (in a good way, not talking about inflammation here :)

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Photo credit: Catherine Kubash

Here's another little secret. Every time I walked down that cobblestone path that led to the beach, I breathed deeply, one step at a time. I felt the heat under my bare feet, and I noticed what I was feeling and thinking. Nobody had to know I was doing a "micro-meditation," I was simply bringing my awareness into my body in the present moment. I also did this while snorkeling, eating and floating in the pool. Back at home, I do this while I'm doing the dishes, gardening, walking...etc. No need to sit quietly on a cushion in a dark room. Life offers endless opportunities to practice mindfulness in a way that is integrated to our everyday activities. I think it's even more effective this way.

Photo credit: Lise Villeneuve

Number 4:
It was my experience that taking good care of the body (regular movement, eating well, sweating a lot and drinking gallons of water) allowed me to really feel grounded in my physical vessel. It may sound obvious, but sometimes I have a tendency to be more in my head and less in touch with the body. This very embodied awareness I felt in Cuba made it easier for me to physically feel and release any passing emotions that wanted to arise. As a result of this practice of letting go of old emotional "stuff", the mind quickly became a lot quieter and peaceful. I remember just sitting on the beach one morning, feeling overwhelmed by this strong wave of gratitude. I felt the emotion move through me and it spontaneously moved out as tears. There was no hesitation or resistance. I felt absolute peace. At home, I am reminded of the importance of daily physical movement to feel fully grounded in my body. This really does make a huge difference in our physical and emotional well being.

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Number 3:
I realized that from this place of grounded presence in my own body, it became a lot easier to remain aware of the stressful thoughts that inevitably came up now and then. In a state of embodied awareness, I found that it was much easier to question the validity of my stressful thoughts and, more importantly, to be able to notice the immediate negative impact these thoughts had on my body (contraction, heaviness, rigidity, lethargy). The connection between thoughts, the body and emotions became crystal clear to me and any emotional tension could be spontaneously released through this awareness. The result of this was a lot more energy because emotions were not being repressed or suppressed in the body. At home, I am reminded to question my thinking anytime I start to feel physical tension or contraction.

Number 2:
Hanging out with this bunch of clowns in Cuba, I was reminded that no matter how mature or refined we think we are, we are all children at heart. We should give ourselves permission to sing, dance, play, laugh our butts off and enjoy life. Every. Single. Day. Not just on special occasions. Once we start allowing ourselves to shamelessly express our joy again (like we spontaneously did when we were little), we realize how naturally intoxicating it feels to be fully alive! Why the heck do we cut ourselves off from our own passion and playfulness? Yvon, Nadia, Catherine, Charles: you could give seminars on how to unleash the inner-child. I laughed so hard it hurt. At home, I am reminded to live joyfully from the heart, to follow my creative impulses (no matter how embarrassing that may look), and to seek the company of people who are not afraid to live fiercely and freely.

Photo credit: Yvon Loiselle

Number 1:
To quote one of my very favourite authors, Dr. David Hawkins: "Nothing in the universe happens by chance or accident. The universe is a coherent concurrence and interaction of innumerable conditions attendant on the infinite number of energy patterns."

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

I believe everything we experience serves our evolution. Everyone we meet is our teacher and our mirror. I don't think we have as much control over "our" life as we think we do, so we might as well enjoy the ride! Worrying is a waste of time anyway. All this to say that this experience was perfect in every way. Catherine, Charles, Yvon, Nadia: is it just me, or do you also feel like this trip was meant to be? I feel like my heart was broken wide open. Gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. A quand le prochain voyage?

Warmly,

Lise Villeneuve
Mindfulness Teacher
www.lisevilleneuve.com

The ONE Thing To Know...

-Mindfulness Bites-

Mindfulness or Mindlessness?

By Lise Villeneuve

If you asked me to share just one simple mindfulness concept with you, this would be it. What I’m about to explain is so basic and so simple, yet it has the potential to completely transform your life by freeing you from so much unnecessary suffering. Are you ready to hear it? First, imagine you had an app or a device that could automatically track, identify and record every single one of your thoughts (I know it’s just a matter of time before such a thing exists!) How many thoughts do you think you would approximately have each day? Scientists tell us we think an average of 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts per day -that’s 35 to 48 thoughts per minute! They also estimate that about 80% of our thoughts are mostly negative. Imagine if we had such an app that tracked all our mental chatter. What do you think we would learn from closely monitoring our thoughts?

Can we control our thoughts?

First, I think the vast majority of us would be amazed at how truly unaware we are of our thoughts. We would be so surprised to review all the things we’ve been telling ourselves in a day: all the little stories we cling to, the judgements, the fears, the beliefs, the assumptions, as well as our hopes, dreams and positive thoughts. It would be quite an eye-opener to see the contents of our minds in one day, but I think what would shock us the most would be the realization that our thoughts are so random and extremely repetitive. We would eventually come to the conclusion that despite what we may believe, we have very little control over our thoughts. If you don’t believe me, sit quietly for five minutes and observe your mental chatter. Can you control it?

Can we control our emotions?

What do you think is the second major thing we would learn from using a device that could instantly show us our thoughts? We would see that what we think directly influences how we feel. Our thoughts generate emotions, and in turn, our emotions give rise to more thoughts, then round and round the cycle goes. If our device showed us we were stuck in negative thinking patterns, then we would immediately make the connection between our dark thoughts and our bad mood, or our discomfort. But here’s the kicker: negative thinking patterns don’t just include self-critical thoughts. They include any thoughts that argue with reality. You know, the thoughts we have that resist what is, the thoughts that fight against what has already happened. The shoulds and shouldn’t haves of our minds. We all have them.

I can't believe she did that...

If our app could clearly show us the thoughts that fight with what is, we would immediately understand how much stress they cause us. “She should or shouldn’t have said that.” We would see how such thoughts - regardless if they are true or not - completely rob us of our natural state of peace and well being. We would notice how much energy we waste by clinging to these thoughts and stories that end up making us feel miserable. With the extra awareness and clarity provided by our device, we could look at any one of our thoughts that argue with what is, such as “He should or shouldn’t have done that” and we could then ask ourselves “when I cling to this thought, how does it make me feel?” What does that feel like in my body? Try it now. Think of a recent situation when you felt irritated, frustrated, sad or angry. What were you telling yourself? How did that make you feel?

After having identified the type of stress, discomfort and resistance created in your body from having focused on that particular thought or story, the next logical step would be to ask: “How would I feel - who would I be - if I didn’t have that thought, or if it never came to my mind?” Again, it doesn’t matter if the thought or story are true, justified or not. How would you feel if you simply didn’t entertain that thought?

Does positive thinking work?

Of course if it weren’t for our neurotic minds, we would all be in a permanent state of bliss. Our challenge is to end the war with our minds, to accept what is - including our compulsive thoughts and our mental stories. And how can we do this? By meeting our fearful, jealous, angry, depressed and resistant thoughts with understanding and compassion. Simply pushing our negative thoughts away or replacing them with positive thoughts doesn’t work. That’s like a band-aid solution: it’s superficial and it prevents us from deeply healing our psychological wounds. We all carry these wounds. Here’s the good news: our negativity can be a blessing because it shows us the parts of ourselves that need our attention, care and compassion. So we have two choices. We can either remain attached to our thoughts and stories and consequently have to deal with the suffering they cause us, or we can sincerely investigate them, learn what they are trying to teach us about ourselves and grow. Mindfulness teaches us how to do this inquiry. It encourages us to become lovers of what is. This is the most direct path to inner peace and freedom.

Putting up with people's B.S.

Investigating our stressful thoughts - especially recurrent thoughts like the ones that make us feel confused, frustrated, sad, angry or any other negative emotion, doesn’t mean we have to put up with people’s B.S. It doesn’t mean we can’t act or initiate change, and it doesn’t invalidate our feelings or our experiences. Sometimes we falsely believe that by holding on to anger, resentments or worry, we remain in control, or we teach others a lesson. But what really happens is that we block off our own energy by holding on to this toxic negativity. Questioning our stressful thoughts doesn’t mean we have to take all the blame, admit defeat or let others walk all over us. So what is the purpose of inquiry?

A person or situation can't make us feel anything

Inquiry simply bring us back to a state of peace, calm and clarity by examining the direct connection between what we are telling ourselves and what we are feeling. It’s never a situation or a person that make us feel anything. It’s always our thoughts about the situation or the person. This is excellent news, because we have the ability to question our thoughts, to meet them with understanding and to become more aware of their power over us. Questioning our thinking helps us release those negative emotions that hold us down, it removes confusion and it gives us peace of mind. It is from this new place of clarity that the best solutions to our problems and conflicts naturally arise. We can now take action without being angry, sad, confused or fearful.

3 questions that will change your life...

We may not have an app to help us track our thoughts yet, but that’s OK, because we have our negative emotions to help us out. They are like our alarm signal that lets us know it’s time to question our thoughts. It’s time for inquiry: what am I thinking right now? (specifically identify your stressful thought, write it down if you can) How do I feel when I think that? (identify your emotions and notice where you feel any body sensations) How would I feel if I didn’t have that thought? (specifically describe how you think you would feel) These questions might seem obvious or simplistic and you might be tempted to just dismiss them, but if you try them out, you will immediately understand their value. These questions were inspired by The Work of Byron Katie. There are a few more steps we can take to get the most out of inquiry, but for now, focusing on these three questions is more than enough.

Bring on the negative thoughts...

There is no need to try and stop, change or eliminate our negative thoughts, because they are our teachers. They show us the patterns that hold us back and keep us trapped in suffering. All that is required is to notice our thoughts, to meet them with compassion and to allow, welcome and release the emotions they stir up. That, my friends is what I wanted to share with you. Inquiry will truly set you free.

Sincerely,

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Are You A, B or C Today?

Which One Are You Today: A, B or C?

-A-

Some days I feel so inadequate.

My heart is restless, forlorn and heavy.

Like a prisoner trapped in a cell made of flesh and bones,

I am unable to escape the dissonant noise of my own cruel mind.

My past wounds and fears keep me confined, confused and paranoid.

Life feels like a burden, my days are filled with angst.

Self-loathing, I begin to wonder if there is something deeply wrong with me.

-B-

Some days I feel so confident.

My heart is filled with joy, I feel competent and fortunate.

The world is my oyster, I have everything under control.

My mind flatters me with kind words, I feel fantastic!

My past wounds and fears have been tucked far, far away from my consciouness

I feel strong and invincible. 

I am in love with all these positive aspects of myself.

-C-

Some days I feel so very aware,

My heart is peaceful, I feel alive and present.

I hear the noise in my mind and watch the thoughts go by without clinging to any of them.

I notice the positive and negative feelings in my body and let them pass right through.

I observe my unconscious human programming and feel compassion for myself and others.

Instead of running away from them, I allow my past wounds to come up to the surface.

I fully feel the trapped emotions, surrender and release them so they can permanently heal.

Life feels more gentle and more predictable from within

I remember that I am a spiritual being living in a temporary human body.

I am not my thoughts, my emotions or my conditioned responses

It makes no sense for me to cling to these or to even want to defend them

With this understanding, I remember to be patient, kind and forgiving with myself 

Especially when I fall back into the trance of duality (A,B or a mix of both)

What I truly am is a Love so pure, so powerful, so miraculous that -when allowed to shine through the layers of ego, instantly obliterates this illusion of who I think I am. Once the illusion is shattered, there no longer is a personal self. No more suffering. Only freedom, joy and deep peace.

Which one are you now?

Peace, my friends. Peace!

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Words of Wisdom From A Seedling

For the past few months, I, like many, have been feeling the weight of the world. I have been struggling to keep my focus on positive, constructive things. I have been experiencing the fear, the insecurity and the anxiety that seem to be the dominant collective vibration lately. 

But today, I feel hopeful again. I have been inspired by a tiny morning glory seedling that I planted just five days ago. This morning, I welcomed it into our world. It emanates a peaceful and serene energy. It doesn't seem to care about Trump, or the environment, or the debt in the U.S. It just is. 

Envious of its stillness, I picked up little Morning Glory and asked it what its secret was. It whispered something in my ear. It was a quote from Nisargadatta Maharaj: "A quiet mind is all you need. All else will happen rightly, once your mind is quiet. As the sun on rising makes the world active, so does self-awareness affect changes in the mind. In the light of calm and steady self-awareness, inner energies wake up and work miracles without any effort on your part."

Huh! Impressed by this little plant's knowledge and wisdom, I replied : But Morning Glory, there is no denying that we are now living in a challenging time of extremes. We are experiencing a profound shift that is urging us to let go of the old paradigms that no longer serve us. We're experiencing it both on a collective and on a personal level. Our old structures and systems are collapsing, and the shadow parts of ourselves that we have been unwilling to acknowledge and integrate are now coming to the surface. This is a terrifying process! How can we keep our minds quiet through this chaos?

Morning Glory must have been channeling Nisargadatta Maharaj, because she replied with another quote from him: "There are always moments when one feels empty and estranged. Such moments are most desirable, for it means the soul has cast its moorings and is sailing for distant places. This is detachment - when the old is over and the new has not yet come. If you are afraid, the state may be distressing, but there is really nothing to be afraid of. Remember the instruction: Whatever you come across - go beyond."

Wow. And THAT, my friends, is why I love gardening! Never underestimate the wisdom of plants!

All the best,

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Answer To The Anonymous Question I Received...

The Universe has amazed me once again with synchronicity. Just last night, I was somehow drawn to watch interviews with Byron Katie -an American woman who struggled through 10 years of depression, rage and self-loathing and who spontaneously woke up one morning in a state of constant joy that has not left her for 22 years. What transformed her life? Byron Katie suddenly understood that when she believed her own thoughts, she suffered, and when she simply questioned these, life became effortless.

After her major awakening, Byron Katie created a simple 4-question process called "The Work" that helps people break free from their limiting thoughts. She has helped millions with The Work and Byron Katie is now known all over the world. She has written many best-selling books, was featured on countless shows such as Oprah and is in high demand for workshops and public speaking everywhere. You can imagine how thrilled I was when she agreed to be featured on my website in a interview for Conscious Living Solutions in August 2015.

Like I said, last night, for some reason, I wanted to know more about Byron Katie even though I had already interviewed her in the past. Her process really resonated with me and reminded me that we are not our thoughts. Some authors, such as Eckhart Tolle, are brilliant at explaining this concept, but when it comes to applying it in our daily lives, it can be a little overwhelming and discouraging. Byron Katie figured out an easy, practical way for people to start freeing themselves from their minds -which is the most direct path to end suffering. It's free, available on her website and accessible to all.

So what's the synchronicity I was referring to? Well this morning I received this anonymous message via my website:

"I really wanted to start my spiritual journey, but what troubles me the most are my thoughts. I get afraid of things that I have never done and these thoughts continue to wander in my mind until I become frustrated. I have learnt that thoughts create our reality according to the law of attraction and these thoughts which are actually my fear are generated again and again against my wish. These thoughts can actually become my reality. Tell me what I can do to stop these thoughts."

As soon as I read this message, I knew that the best resource I could offer would be "The Work" of Byron  Katie! We can't stop our thoughts, but we can become more aware of them. We can remind ourselves that who we truly are is much more than our thoughts. We can invite more stillness into our lives in order to allow ourselves to experience the deep peace of being without the compulsive need to do, or think all the time.

Whoever you are, dear anonymous friend, I hope this helps! Thanks for your question. You are mirroring what millions of others are also asking at this time. I believe that we were somehow connected through your question, the web, Byron Katie and my sudden impulse to watch her videos last night! The Universe works in miraculous ways!

Thanks for reading,

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Shit Happens. Are We Going To Let it Control Us?

I was in Cuba a couple weeks ago, splashing around in the warm, turquoise waters of the Caribbean. Our little group was discussing what makes a good vacation. Was it the hotel amenities? The food? The company? The beach? We concluded that a combination of all these things made somewhat of a difference on our overall level of enjoyment, but the most determinant variable was our state of mind. Were we committed to having a good time from the start, or were we ready to complain at the first inconvenience?

Before booking this trip, we all read the Trip Advisor reviews to have a better idea of the environment we were about to immerse ourselves in, but the truth is, we never have full control over our circumstances, no matter how much we prepare ourselves. Shit happens. This rule doesn't just apply to our vacations, obviously, it applies to our daily life. The good news is that even though we have limited control over our external circumstances, we have full control over what happens in our inner-landscape. By inner-landscape, I mean our thoughts, our emotions, our perceptions and our reactions.

Let me illustrate this with an example. First, we think a thought (such as "this hotel room sucks, I got ripped off"). Thoughts automatically translate into emotions in our body, so we may suddenly start to feel frustrated, even angry. Now all our perceptions become tainted with this anger, so we're more likely to notice more things that justify and increase our frustration. "I can't believe they gave me this crappy room, I don't want to be stuck in this dump, it will ruin my vacation." Next thing we know, we are yelling at the reception, having a full-blown tantrum that doesn't get us anywhere because no other rooms are available!

Thankfully, the story didn't end up like this for me, but I did have a below-average room in Cuba. The air-conditioner, safe and fridge were out of order, the room was full of mosquitoes and was on the first level, which was very loud with no view at all. I didn't feel good in this room, so I decided to use this negative situation to my advantage. I learned fairly recently that any time we are feeling bad and don't like what's going on around us, it's a golden opportunity to clearly affirm what we would like to experience instead. It takes a little effort to remember this at times, but our thoughts really do create our reality, so staying stuck in negativity and complaining about what we don't like only brings us more of what we are focusing on -bad things!

I began to imagine myself in a nicer, quieter room, higher up, with a beautiful view of the ocean. That felt good, and I truly believed it was possible to make this happen. I calmly went to the reception, explained my case, but was told there were no other rooms available. They told me to try my luck again tomorrow. I did, and was very pleased to be upgraded to the top floor, corner room with no neighbours, ocean view, with a complimentary bottle of Rhum! The maid even made beautiful swans, boats and animals with the towels every day! I was very grateful for this turn of events, it made my vacation even better than I decided it was going to be!

So I got upgraded, no big deal right? The point I'm trying to make here is that I could have arrived at this same result more aggressively, by complaining, by resisting, by raising my voice, by thinking and feeling thoughts/emotions that are unpleasant and create unnecessary stress for myself and others. That was a choice I had. Acting up and being demanding doesn't mean we'll get what we want faster, on the contrary. We're not naturally conditioned to act this way, but if we're able to be crystal clear about what we want instead of resisting the hand that's been given to us, we actually have more power to alter our circumstances.

So when the food is repetitive and cold, the mosquitoes are eating us alive and the pool smells like sewage, we still have control over how we are going to interpret our reality! Can we actively do something to change our situation? If the answer is yes, we can focus on taking action without falling into the trap of negativity, complaining and resistance. If the answer is no, we might as well focus on something that will make us feel better, unless we want to attract more negative circumstances our way! It's a matter of perception.

What determines if we are going to be happy or unhappy is not actually the events and circumstances that are occurring in our lives, it's always our personal interpretation of these events! We can have complete control over our inner-landscape if we learn to observe and tame our monkey-mind. Once we master this, nobody / nothing has the power to make us react any more. I'll let you know when I get there! It may take a couple more lifetimes! ;)

Warmly,

Lise
Health Coach and Reiki Master
www.lisevilleneuve.com