Mindfulness: the Cult

-Mindfulness Bites-

Mindfulness: the Cult

By Lise Villeneuve

What exactly is mindfulness anyway? I’ve attempted to explain it many times to family members who are very religious and somehow, they think mindfulness IS Buddhism, or (gasp!) some kind of satanic New Age cult. Therefore, in their eyes, I am headed straight to hell for practising such heresy. But don’t worry, we’re still one big, loving family. Our gatherings are always very lively and stimulating, there is never a dull moment!

But seriously, mindfulness has nothing to do with religion or even New Age fads. In fact, mindfulness is much closer to psychology than religion. By the way, in case you’re wondering, despite my upbringing, I’m not religious at all -in the sense that I don’t participate in any particular rituals from any specific faith. However, I consider myself very spiritual and I do strongly believe in a divine creator or Higher Power, to avoid the label “God.” So whether you’re religious or not, it’s all good, there is no conflict, no contradiction between mindfulness and religion.

What is it? I would say it’s the art of being aware, of paying attention. Paying attention not only to what’s happening in our external world, but, more importantly, to what’s going on in our inner world. Mindfulness develops our emotional intelligence. It’s kind of like the instruction manual we were never given at birth that helps us figure out the relationship between our thoughts, our emotions and our bodily sensations.

I’m not quite sure why this seems to threaten my religious family. Perhaps it’s the meditation aspect of mindfulness that makes them uncomfortable. Meditation makes me uncomfortable too, especially when I have to sit in the same pose for a long time and my legs start to cramp up, but I guess that’s a different kind of discomfort. Meditation is simply a way of quieting the mind and being still. Mindfulness encourages us to practice noticing our thoughts and our feelings so that we can become less reactive, less controlled by them. It empowers us to make wiser decisions with a clear mind.

Why has mindfulness become so incredibly popular over the last few years? Probably because of its many scientifically-proven benefits. Such as? Well I’m glad you asked. There are so many benefits that I decided to incorporate them into a little rap song. I’d like to dedicate it to certain members of my family (all in good humour):

When you feel like a mess, like a big ball of stress

You can always rely on mindfulness

Take a deep breath, fill up your chest

Mindfulness will help you feel your best

Notice your thoughts, notice how you feel

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness keeps your brain real sharp

It helps your memory and it’s good for your heart

It lowers your blood pressure, brings down your stress

It helps with depression, it helps with distress

Notice your thoughts, notice how you feel

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

It improves your focus and boosts resilience

It makes you feel good so you can show off your brilliance

Improve your health and your self-compassion

With mindfulness: It’s the latest fashion

Notice your thoughts, notice how you feel

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness helps in so many ways

It’s like “miracle whip”, you know, the mayonnaise?

It gives life some flavour, it gives it some punch

It helps you cope when you’re in a crunch

Mindfulness really fills your cup

So if it’s a cult, then where do I sign up?

Mindfulness really fills your cup

So if it’s a cult, then where do I sign up?

Thanks for reading, and for more detailed information about the benefits of mindfulness check out this link: https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/benefits-of-mindfulness/
(Mindfulness decreases stress and anxiety levels, improves emotion regulation, induces a state of relaxation, which in turn improves higher brain functioning, increases immune function, lowers blood pressure and heart rate, increases awareness, attention, clarity and focus, it accelerates recovery of the body, decreases depressive symptoms, increases self-compassion, improves general health, decreases reactivity, increases curiosity, tolerance, patience and self-acceptance, it improves academic performance, it’s a buffer against bullying and depression, it boosts resilience, reduces behavior and attention problems in children, improves job performance in the workplace, decreases burnout, and it primes our brain for  better learning and remembering.)

Sincerely,

Lise Villeneuve
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Are You A, B or C Today?

Which One Are You Today: A, B or C?

-A-

Some days I feel so inadequate.

My heart is restless, forlorn and heavy.

Like a prisoner trapped in a cell made of flesh and bones,

I am unable to escape the dissonant noise of my own cruel mind.

My past wounds and fears keep me confined, confused and paranoid.

Life feels like a burden, my days are filled with angst.

Self-loathing, I begin to wonder if there is something deeply wrong with me.

-B-

Some days I feel so confident.

My heart is filled with joy, I feel competent and fortunate.

The world is my oyster, I have everything under control.

My mind flatters me with kind words, I feel fantastic!

My past wounds and fears have been tucked far, far away from my consciouness

I feel strong and invincible. 

I am in love with all these positive aspects of myself.

-C-

Some days I feel so very aware,

My heart is peaceful, I feel alive and present.

I hear the noise in my mind and watch the thoughts go by without clinging to any of them.

I notice the positive and negative feelings in my body and let them pass right through.

I observe my unconscious human programming and feel compassion for myself and others.

Instead of running away from them, I allow my past wounds to come up to the surface.

I fully feel the trapped emotions, surrender and release them so they can permanently heal.

Life feels more gentle and more predictable from within

I remember that I am a spiritual being living in a temporary human body.

I am not my thoughts, my emotions or my conditioned responses

It makes no sense for me to cling to these or to even want to defend them

With this understanding, I remember to be patient, kind and forgiving with myself 

Especially when I fall back into the trance of duality (A,B or a mix of both)

What I truly am is a Love so pure, so powerful, so miraculous that -when allowed to shine through the layers of ego, instantly obliterates this illusion of who I think I am. Once the illusion is shattered, there no longer is a personal self. No more suffering. Only freedom, joy and deep peace.

Which one are you now?

Peace, my friends. Peace!

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Top 5 Life-Changing Facts About Emotions

Why do we feel emotions? What is their purpose? Is it really possible to teach kids how to self-regulate their moods? How should we deal with the tantrums and meltdowns caused by negative emotions? How should we manage our own negative emotions that feel so uncomfortable? In this 3-part article about emotional intelligence, we will explore all these questions, and much more.

Part 1: Top 5 Life-Changing Facts About Emotions

Part 2: Helping our loved ones through an emotional storm

Part 3: Practical tools and techniques to deal with negative emotions at home, at work and in the classroom

 -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Part one: 

Top 5 Life-Changing Facts About Emotions

Most of us have been conditioned to love and value our positive emotions, but we avoid our negative emotions like the plague! We run away from them, we hide them from ourselves, we project them onto other people, and we even feel ashamed or guilty when these negative emotions catch up with us. Why do we do this? Nobody can feel only positive emotions all the time, so we should give ourselves a break. We’re only human, and that means we get to experience the full spectrum of emotions: positive and negative. (Below is Robert Plutchik's wheel of emotions).

As promised, here are the Top 5 Life-Changing Facts About Emotions:

1. All our emotions are valid, acceptable and important -especially the negative ones! They are not "wrong" and nobody should feel guilty or ashamed about the way they feel. Remember that our feelings and our behaviours are two different things. You can correct behaviours without shaming the feelings behind them.

2. Emotions are at the heart of our internal guidance system. Feelings create thousands of thoughts, and these thoughts then generate more feelings and emotions. It’s a self-perpetuating cycle. Our emotions are directly transferred and felt in our body. Positive emotions will make us feel good, relaxed, open, energized and inspired, whereas negative emotions will make us feel tense, constricted, closed, lethargic, sluggish and drained. So by paying attention to the way you feel in your body, (open or closed, good or bad) you’ll always know if you’re in a positive or negative emotional state. How do you feel now?

3. The emotional states we experience are not random at all. Emotions have been classified in a scale of emotions, from the lowest states to the highest. It's very difficult to make a sudden jump from the lower levels (such as depression) directly to the highest levels (such as optimism or joy), or the other way around. Our emotional states fluctuate during the day, gradually moving up or down the scale. Here’s the good news! We can change how we feel with our thoughts, our actions and our focus. To do this, we just need to reach for a better-feeling thought, or an action that will bring us joy. Try it now. Think about something that makes you smile. Breathe in that feeling. You have just moved yourself up one notch on the scale of emotions! It’s very simple. If we learn to pay attention to how we’re feeling in our body at any given moment –and we do our best to keep ourselves up in the more positive range of emotions on the scale, we won’t suddenly be ambushed by strong negative feelings. However, when the negative emotions do show up, that’s ok! They serve a very important purpose and they should not be ignored.

4. Negative emotions tell us when we're off track, or out of alignment with the wisdom of our higher-Selves. Negative emotions are like a wake-up call. They are telling us that we are now quite low on the scale of emotions and it would be wise to slowly climb back up by either changing our actions or our thoughts. It’s also possible that some old unresolved emotions have been stirred up again. If that’s the case, we can decide if we’d like to work on releasing those suppressed emotions, or if the timing is not appropriate, we can shift our focus to better-feeling thoughts or actions and come back to these at a later time.

5. Everyone experiences negative emotions sooner or later, but we don’t have to stay stuck in negativity. Beware! Negativity can be highly addictive and contagious, so you don’t want to dwell there. It’s addictive because it offers a secret, pleasurable payoff to the ego. Unchecked, it will quickly pick up momentum and generate more negativity. Remember: the purpose of negative emotions is to make us aware that we are heading in the wrong direction, or that something needs to be released if we want to move forward and feel good again. Once we have gotten the message and made the appropriate changes, we can start to move back up the scale of emotions to a better-feeling state. Sometimes –like in the case of grief, or severe depression, the healing process can take some time, so we have to be patient with ourselves. Having an attitude of surrender and acceptance of whatever feelings we are experiencing accelerates the process. If we resist our negative feelings, we can’t heal them, because we’re just trying to escape. Instead, these feelings have to be willingly released. I will be giving more details about releasing negative feelings in the following sections.

In short:

1)     All our emotions are valid, acceptable and important, especially the negative ones!

2)    To instantly have a good idea of where you are on the scale of emotions, simply notice how you are feeling in your body. Feeling good / open means you are experiencing positive emotions (#7 and up on the scale), feeling any kind of tension or resistance means you are experiencing negative emotions (#8 and down on the scale).

3)     Everyone can learn to move themselves up the scale of emotions by choosing better-feeling thoughts or actions, or by releasing pent-up emotions.

4)     Don’t try to escape or ignore negative emotions, even if they are often inconvenient and uncomfortable. They are sending you an important message. Make the appropriate changes and move on.

5)     Don’t get sucked in. Negativity is highly addictive and contagious, so don’t dwell there too long. Be aware of the secret pleasurable payoff our egos get from negativity. Nevertheless, it feels much better to be in a state of joy and peace. Anyone can get there. It just takes a little will and courage.

Stay tuned for parts 2 and 3. In part 2, we’ll discuss what you can do to help a loved one navigate through an emotional storm. Part 3 is all about practical tools and techniques to help you deal with negative emotions at home, at work or in the classroom.

In the meantime, if you’d like some extra resources to teach children about emotional intelligence (mindfulness), I’ve written a complete program called Conscious Kids / Enfants Lucides. The lessons are taught through creative short stories, followed by fun activities that can be done at home or in the classroom. 

Level 1 covers:

- The relationship between thoughts and emotions;

- How to move ourselves up the scale of emotions;

- How to deal with strong negative emotions, and more. 

Thanks for reading! Coming soon is Part 2: Helping our loved ones through an emotional storm.

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Anyone Else Feeling Like Crap Lately?

Feeling Like Crap...

For the past couple of days, I've been feeling a little down, sad and fearful of our future. At the core of these negative emotions was a feeling of powerlessness towards the state of our planet. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about, as I sense that this feeling of powerlessness is embedded in our collective consciousness right now. The negativity is simply overwhelming. 

"Us" Versus "Them"...

Everyday, we see examples of people reinforcing the illusion of our separation from each other. Whether we like to admit it or not, most of us have bought into the "us" versus "them" mentality. The "me" versus "you" mentality is exactly the same, by the way. Science now confirms we are all connected in a unified field of consciousness. We are all One. 

This means that when our brothers and sisters thrive, this positively affects us. It also means that when they suffer -whether on a physical, mental or emotional level - this negatively affects us as well. We may not be consciously aware of this entanglement, thanks to the ego's mechanisms, but we are indeed electromagnetically connected to each other (look up the quantum entanglement experiment). It's no wonder that we can all feel the heaviness in the field right now.

Apples and Oranges...

So how can we deal with this negativity? Personally, I've been feeling confused by three overlapping issues that I think should be addressed separately:

1) What is the best, most effective way to actually take a stand for what we believe to be right in the world? Can we make a difference?

2) How do we deal with our own negative emotions? How can we remain aware of what's going on in the world without constantly feeling depressed, powerless or numb? 

3) How can we decipher truth from falsehood? Are we being told the truth? Are we being manipulated on a large scale? How can we explain the apathy of so many people?


Hocus Focus...

Let's start with #2 -How to deal with our own negative emotions. It all starts here. First of all, we control what we focus on. Emily Maroutian's quote beautifully explains this: 

"Energy is the currency of the universe. When you “pay” attention to something, you buy that experience. So when you allow your consciousness to focus on someone or something that annoys you, you feed it your energy, and it reciprocates with the experience of being annoyed. Be selective in your focus because your attention feeds the energy of it and keeps it alive, not just within you, but in the collective consciousness as well."

Our Digital Addiction...

Sometimes, despite our best intentions, we get exposed to stuff that brings us down. Since we're all interconnected, particularly through the internet nowadays, our focus is largely influenced by the collective focus. These days, it ain't the most uplifting! 

When we're not feeling resilient, when we are emotionally vulnerable, we should probably be extremely careful about what we expose ourselves to. I'm not saying to live in a vacuum, or to be in denial about the world, but to CHOOSE the best moments to educate ourselves about current events that have the potential to suck the energy right out of us. When we feel powerless, depressed, numb or apathetic, we can't make any positive changes, and in fact, we bring down the collective energy of our planet, making it harder for others to find solutions.

Oops! Too Late...

But many of us get contaminated with fear and negativity on a daily basis! Now what? The only way to release negative emotions is by embracing them and expressing them appropriately. The 4-minute video below beautifully illustrates how emotions get stuck in our body, and how to release them: 

Recharge Your Battery...

Once we are back in alignment with our higher-self, we feel better, and we become much more resilient, empowered and inspired. It's only in this state that we can truly make positive changes in the world. This answers question #1 -What's the most effective way to make a difference in the world? 

Spiritual-Emotional Armour...

If we want to be activists, peaceful warriors or freedom-fighters, we have to be dressed properly for the job! We have to plug into the Source that creates our shield of power and emotional resilience. We can't go out on the battlefield in a vulnerable, wounded state of anger, fear, sadness or resistance and expect to make a positive difference. 

Here is a 30-second video that teaches a heart-coherence technique to instantly neutralize the effects of stress and negativity. It works!:

Did You Forget?

When we get overwhelmed with negative emotions, including apathy, it's especially easy to forget or to underestimate that our greatest power is within. By creating a loving, compassionate, empowered energy field that emanates from our heart, we affect everyone around us. We are literally changing the world by saying "no" to the negativity and fear that we are being fed daily. 

This brief video with Gregg Braden lifted my spirits instantly:

Illuminati? New World Order?

Now what about question # 3 -How can we decipher truth from falsehood? Are we being told the truth? Are we being manipulated on a large scale? How can we explain the apathy of so many people? I recently discovered the very well produced documentary called "Thrive" (see preview below). Although it was released in 2011, it's still very relevant today. 

Could we be controlled by a powerful elite, a cabal? Should we take the Illuminati's plans of a New World Order seriously? I thought this was just conspiracy-theory fiction, until I started hearing it over and over again from an increasing number of respectable sources. I'm not sure what to think at this point. I would love to hear what you think, but please do NOT watch this if you are feeling emotionally vulnerable right now! Although this documentary proposes solutions to the problems they are exposing, it can still be very unsettling to watch.

That being said, you can watch the entire movie for free -available in 27 languages- by streaming it right here: http://www.thrivemovement.com/the_movie 

Join the Force, not the Dark Side...

Regardless if we are being told the truth or not, it's important to remember what we discussed in questions # 1 and # 2. How we respond to our circumstances positively or negatively influences the field that connects and affects us all. 

Feeling negative emotions is not bad in itself. Feeling crappy is an important signal that tells us we are off track. We are simply not aligned with what serves our best interests -from a spiritual perspective. To release these negative emotions, we have to become very aware of them and we have to stop feeding them with more negative thoughts and focus. Once we free ourselves from the negativity and get realigned with our Source of power, we are then in the best position to change the world. 

Here's What You Can Do Now...

Please join me today in creating a beautiful field of love, compassion and joy around ourselves. This field will extend out to our communities, our countries and our planet. Breathe deeply in and out of your heart area, focus on something that makes you feel joyful. Let that energy radiate around you. Thank you for making a difference! Thank you for sharing this with others.

Much Love,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Hitting Rock Bottom. Can You Relate?

I received this beautifully candid letter today (below). The author intended to share it with you on this blog. He's been going through some intensely difficult times and he had the courage to openly write about his experience and perspective. 

Writing is always extremely therapeutic, and it has the double benefit of creating connections -connections with people who are going through similar challenges and also connections with people who are able to offer words of support. 

What's amazing is that even if we never meet, or never even become aware of each other's existence, we are still all deeply connected to each other! Each of our individual perspectives alter our collective human experience. You may not know it, but the story below has already affected you on some profound level, and your personal story is also affecting others right now. Why? Because ultimately, we are all the One Consciousness, not just our individual bodies and stories. By relating to someone else's story, by sending them a thought of compassion, by understanding their pain and acknowledging that you too, have felt these emotions, you are actually nurturing your own self-love.

I leave you now with this brave tale filled with heartbreak, despair and hope. I know that you reading this story means the beginning of a new chapter for the author. May this inspire you to reflect upon your own story and empower you to rewrite your next chapter according to your heart's desires. You hold the pen!

Warmly,

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

*******************************************************

Since I can remember, it's been a struggle. Life was never the easiest when young, one of seven but so much younger than my other siblings, an empty house cold and unwelcoming, mother caring but burnt out, father hostile, a definite mistake on the human landscape as far as he was concerned. One that I paid for without realizing that my life was different from the other kids.

Growing up was an isolated experience. I did have great difficulty integrating with other kids and spent most of my time alone, harassed, maligned and bullied by it seemed everyone. I can clearly remember being afraid for most of my childhood, when high school came along it was to get even worse! It's only 4 years or so and so much was to change?

The age of 14 onwards was a turning point. Made some friends, avoided those I feared and got on with life. Leaving home was right up there in the to do list. Sports came as a surprise to me, I began martial arts and developed to the age of 16 into another guy entirely, knew my goals, had a plan.

Found a job locally in a garage, left home, began to really work at this thing called life, three jobs and money in my pocket, still alone, a little bit scared of the female form, unable to socialize in a way that mattered, needed to work at that. I began working nightclubs, doing my day job and working on the black for extra money. Life was good but still missing love.

Then by chance I became popular, gods knows why. I met some lovely ladies and in particular met one special person. Life was definitely changing, sex was fabulous, what had I been doing all this time without it! I was hooked on sex, women and lust, what a wonderful world we live in.

From the age 21 I was married, life was good, but not for long. Within 8 years its seemed I had attached a lot of responsibility to my life which was very uncomfortable, I realized this was not for me, old married life perceptions haunted me, mortgages, debts, kids, I would be my father ! NO WAY angry annoyed and bitter. Marriage over by unanimous default, loved that girl but could not live with her a pattern for the future ! If only I knew then what I know now.

Work filled my life, some highs, some lows. I was self employed, loved the independence and no complaints. As I grew older, sports were important, work was important and relationships were what I lived for. I loved too much? gave too much and left nothing for myself. Anything to avoid being lonely and alone. I had fabulous relationships, lovely girls, some more so on the outside than the inside, found love and lost it many times.

But still I felt insecure amongst others, uncomfortable and awkward. What's wrong with me? Little did I know that one day I would write this retrospective of myself.

I moved abroad, took my darling wife with me, seeking a new life for us in the sun. Had to leave my home, depressing, stuck and dead ended in an economy that was busted, business struggling, becoming very depressed with the position I was in.

I feared the move to end my self-employed life and the cutting of my arms and legs feeling it gave me. For some years my wife had been depressed deeply at times, she affected me down to the core, no amount of money, travel or material things helped, but she wanted sun at any price. I agreed so we left and headed to the Mediterranean. I worked my butt off contracting and missed my wife, my evenings, my weekends, my life! My self-esteem withered, worked in an industry of people whom I had nothing in common, made the best of it and suffered in silence. A nervous breakdown I think it's called. I knew I was losing everything in my life but what to do? Keep working, make money and get out of this game as soon as possible. Some plan,my spouse loved her life. A little lonely she said, but she had my fabulous dog and a few new friends?

Problem was what's next? I am 50 something and did not wish to spend years away from home as a lifestyle, nervous breakdown, stress and no help from my now very happy wife. She had money, no ties, a beautiful house, fancy car and men in her life with whom she could have fun. And I — was paying for it. This job was killing me, I had no sport, just pressure and a hole in my heart. I lost 22 kilos in weight! I needed to, but that was not the reason, I was very depressed, sad and lonely.

The end of my world hit hard, in January I came home to find all this out, quit my job and sat in an empty house alone in the middle of nowhere literally.

The house was spooky, half empty after the sale my wife conducted in secret whilst I worked. She played me well, became a new woman and ran off with some guy who would continue to pay for the lifestyle she craved. I loved her, still but divorced her, forced the issue and was shocked to hear that she thought I would never do it! I miss her, but knew she had to get out of my life, my decision not hers, we were toxic to each other.

Wow, I hit the floor hard, wished to die, cried buckets and for the first time in my life took all the time in the world to think and seek answers to the question. Why was I so sad and depressed? Why was I so insecure? What next? The phone was dead, I had so many sim cards people just gave up, which country code, when available etc, no one called, no one wrote, I was screwed?

Now 6 months later I leave for a new home, in a part of Europe where people live! A house of my own, my furniture, my car, my sanctuary. It's three weeks to move day and I can't stand sitting here any longer. For the past few months I have forced myself to get out! The house is haunted or cursed, not sure which. I travelled to Columbia, Cuba, Ibiza, UK and Turkey, UK. And now I think a short break to Palma sounds great from where I am sitting.

I lost my way many years ago, became subservient to my wife, a second class citizen, was made to feel inferior, uncultured, thick, unintelligent, lost respect for myself and like when I was young I let people walk all over me, use me and abuse me. I was angry, annoyed, panicked, every emotion in the same minute was the norm.

If you've read this far, your probably thinking what's the point of all of this? What did I learn about myself? How did I recover? What words of wisdom have I got for you to cling to?

I can say that I sought a different path. I promised myself to forget about work for a while and started to read self- help articles, I got social on line and one person told me of the book she was reading titled "Mindset Mastery". I bought it and went on holiday working through the new strangeness of manifestation, positive energy and divine guidance. I became religious (not) I wanted to believe, I needed a new path, and I can say it's working.

I read and wrote and synthesised my goals, changed my beliefs and carved my own path out of this hell hole that shelters me from rain. I can say that things started to happen. I met the most wonderful people, doors opened, green lights, I even got my bag from the baggage carousel number one on the belt! Synchronicity exists in my life.

My changing moment was standing in the hotel check-in in Cuba. I met the most significant person in my life ever, and she does not ask for anything from me. She changed my life in a week, mentored my new beliefs and listened to my horrible past experiences, advised and shared some very private issues and experiences with me. I felt that the Universe had answered me! Thank you so much.

I could write books about my thoughts and feelings but to be honest, all of us if faced with my kind of dilemma need help. Don't do this alone, speak to someone, seek alternatives, take time and learn to breathe slowly, it really works. Look upwards you'll feel better when you do.

I know that for myself I wished to die, I wished to cease to exist. Could neither go outside nor speak and in the end, I took time to accept that I have to be able to sit in the dark unafraid. I had to learn to talk to the spaces and fear not, as I would be ok, no monster was coming to eat me.

After this realization, I clung to the writings of the self-help gurus, met my mentor and began to plan for change. It was slower than expected, I usually don't ponder or consider too deeply, mostly due to peer pressure, debt and perceived responsibilities to my family and not to myself.

I'm not cured, I never will be. I have a sickness called acute depression, undiagnosed, hidden from the world and my doctor. Or do I ??????

My advice is don't be like me, don't take too much responsibility, consider yourself, love yourself ,forgive yourself, like yourself.

Luck is a big part of this also... or is it? You manifest your own future, I now believe. Choosing to be in a happy state or feeling is brought about by our own beliefs and expectations. If you believe it's going to be a bad day, it usually is.

It's also true to say that I shed a lot of my problems by moving, and leaving behind old friends who, in many cases, were not good for me, some actually capitalized on my kindness.

I believe so strongly now that I can make it! I even wish to change my name and build a new future without being followed or the subject of conversations about me, better to cut the past and look forward. I know when I move that I will have to integrate socially. Will do so by different name and build my new life around places and people I love to be with.

Lastly, I need a new job. I am working up some ideas, nothing solid yet, but the shoots are growing.

Most important, my sense of purpose must be served somehow. I still love the female form and seek that special person. I have formed new relationships but know that I will not allow anyone in my future to affect me so much as my former wife did. To be in love, in lust, be happy and seek adventure sure!

Thank you L for your love and kindness, without which I would no longer exist. Forever in your debt.

S.

Wisdom From a Local Enlightened Squirrel...

A few days ago, I looked out our dining room window and was ecstatic to see little Skittles hanging out around a tree right in front of our house! For those of you who missed the story about our little orphaned squirrel, you can catch up here:
http://lisevilleneuve.blogspot.ca/2015/05/my-love-story-with-rodent.html

The kids and I happily followed Skittles to the park across the street and spent about 30 delightful minutes with him. How did we know it really was Skittles? Well, for one thing, he let Emma pet him! Also, a mom (or foster mom) easily recognizes her baby! :) I can't express enough how happy I am to know that he is thriving back in his natural environment. The fact that he comes over to visit is like icing on the cake!

This squirrel story has allowed the children and I to experience a pure, simple joy of Being that emanates from deep within us. We feel overwhelming Love and a strong connection towards this little creature who needed a helping hand. Even writing about it now, I am intoxicated by this feeling of warmth and oneness. I wish I could upload the feeling right here on this blog and you could spontaneously experience it with the click of a button! But maybe you can think back of a time when you felt something similar? Holding your baby for the first time? Spending some time with your pet? Watching a beautiful sunset? Being with someone who loves you unconditionally? Are you able to tap into that feeling? Doesn't it feel incredible?

I gotta say, Skittles' visit was perfect timing this week, because I've been going through some pretty heavy stuff lately. I've been "purging" old emotions, letting go of past beliefs and conditionings, and it's been a little exhausting! Skittles (who looks a bit like Yoda at times!) reminded me that I always have access to this beautiful inner-peace, if I can simply allow myself to dive into it. When times get stressful and challenging (as they inevitably will, thanks to the ego), we can always find something beautiful and uplifting to focus on, even if it's a memory in our past. The simple act of going back to that feeling changes our mood, raises our vibration and improves our outlook on life. Skittles says " Breathe in the light, exhale the old, stale energy and imagine it going back down to the core of the Earth. Use the force." Lol.

Perhaps Skittles is an old soul who came back in this life as a squirrel to help us poor humans evolve! Or not. But here's something else he made me remember. Whenever we feel bad, overwhelmed with negative emotions and powerless, it means there's a gap between where we currently are, and where we want to be. In this "gap" that sometimes feels like hell, we hold on to many unmet desires (they may be conscious or unconscious) and the frustration we feel comes from our inability to meet these needs and to get ourselves to that "place" our souls know we want to be. Makes sense?

It's empowering to realize this because instead of staying stuck and blinded by our frustration and despair, we can start to ask ourselves "what would I rather experience instead?", "where would I rather be?", "what would I prefer?" By taking our focus off what's dragging us down, we stop hemorrhaging all our energy into negative thoughts and we can start to move towards our desires. Feeling bad allows us to understand what we really want, but we have to be able to get up, figure out what that is, and go get it. A good place to start is to gravitate towards whatever brings us a feeling of relief. What can you do today that will give you that sense of relief? For me, it's going outside, getting some fresh air and sunshine. Thanks for reading, have a good week!

Warmly,

Lise
Health Coach / Reiki Master
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Are You On The Express Way To Lasting Happiness?

I had a vivid flashback from my past life yesterday!

I'm not talking about a past life in a different body from this one, I'm simply referring to my past as a singer-songwriter and touring artist...and let me tell you, it does feel like it was in another lifetime! As exhilarating as it was, I would NOT go back to that lifestyle as I feel much more balanced and content now. Have a look at the video above, you'll see what that looked like. Why am I even writing about this topic, you may ask?

Well, yesterday, we helped my parents move some junk out of their basement. There was a large box of my old stuff, and in it, I found a thick file of emails my dad had printed and kept. They were all emails I had sent him during my "I'm-trying-to-make-it-in-the-music-business" years. Wow. I can't believe how much clarity I gained from reading those old messages! It almost felt like putting a puzzle together. I told Rob, as I was reading one letter after the other, that it felt as though I was reading someone else's life, not mine!

I almost felt nauseous, as my body was flashed back to some of the predominant emotions I felt back then: insecurity, anxiety, confusion, powerlessness. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't all bad. My life was like a giant, exciting adventure that brought me all over the globe, but when you're on a roller-coaster ride, you have to expect extreme highs and extreme lows. I was fully embracing the polarities of life, completely unaware that my ego was in the driver's seat!

What I found the most difficult - but probably didn't have the hindsight to realize back then, was that my success depended on everyone else's approval : the record producers, the tour organizers, the radio stations, the judges at the music competitions, the people who approved the grants, even the public who listened to my music! Talent, discipline and determination were just not enough for me to keep moving forward. I had to scramble from job to job, never knowing what was coming up in the next few months.

I considered myself to have been one of the lucky ones, too, since I won some competitions, had a unique opportunity to do a solo tour in 8 countries, worked on cruise ships and received funding to produce my CD and music video. Despite the exhilarating ride, what started out as a love and passion for music turned into pressure and high expectations of perfection from myself and everyone. What I really wanted was to feel loved, appreciated, special and validated -just like everyone, right? However, it took me awhile to realize that I would never find those things through a career, no matter how successful I'd get.

When I came back home to Montreal after my whirlwind world tour, things fell apart. At least, that's what it looked like on the surface, but now I realize it was the beginning of true sanity. Nothing made sense to me any more, I was pregnant and I went through this deep, dark depression. It was sort of like a "dark night of the soul". I thought I'd never snap out of it, but I did after a few months, and it was the beginning of my gradual awakening. For the first time ever, I discovered what the ego was, and I understood how it had been a major driving force in my life. Although part of me had been seeking truth through writing and songs, the lifestyle I had been living didn't make sense to me any more. Seeking happiness externally was futile.

I am so thankful to now have this clarity! I am much more aware of the many superficial, yet alluring ego traps society offers us. I know there is nothing wrong with pursuing projects, goals and ambitions, as long as we don't expect to find fulfilment through these secondary roads. I now know that the Express Way to lasting happiness, peace, joy, harmony and love is Consciousness. It will drive you right back to your heart and spirit.

Warmly,

Lise
Health Coach and Reiki Master
www.lisevilleneuve.com