Sleep, My Darling...

Sleep, My Darling...

If only we could see

How blind we are

If only we could know

How truly kind we are...

If only we could be

The ocean of peace

 That rests

Beneath the restless mind

Beneath 

Our thousand painful scars

If only we could see

Just what we are,

If only we were willing 

To heal those wretched scars

If only we could see

The Love beaming

From our radiant heart

Like a fire

Brighter 

Than a thousand stars

If only we could trust

That all is well

If only we could know

That all is One

We could peek through that rigid crust

Far beyond the ego's shell

Beyond the walls of our personal hell

If only we could see

That all is One

If only we could know

That all is well

Perhaps we could awaken...

Awaken from the spell

Until then,

Sleep, my darling...

Sleep well

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Are You Game?

Are we really all that different?

On the surface, it may look like we are all unique and have very different needs, challenges, desires and ambitions. However, once we have the courage to dive a little deeper into the heart of who - or what - we are, we soon discover that what we truly crave is universal : inner peace, joy, unconditional love, and freedom from our negative states.

Many of us intuitively know that these qualities are nowhere to be found in the world « out there », yet we continue to search for them by constantly rearranging the circumstances of our life. This is like trying to change the reflection we see of ourselves in a mirror, without being willing to modify or to question the source of the image itself - who we are.

What is at the root of our constant restlessness, our agitation and our psychological suffering? It is this profoundly distorted image we have of ourselves. Are we merely separate entities made of flesh and bones, or are we interconnected spiritual beings having a temporary human experience? As long as we hold on to the idea of a separate self dominated by the survival instincts of the ego, then lasting freedom, inner-peace, joy and unconditional love will remain out of reach.

To be honest...

Frankly, I am not interested in helping people simply rearrange the circumstances of their life so they can feel temporary relief, wordly success or superficial self-confidence. I am not interested in patching up the cracks in their wounded ego so that they can « function normally », like everyone else who is sleepwalking under the trance of their ego. Rather, I am interested in helping individuals wake up permanently to their full potential as a spiritual being. This is where real emotional, physical and spiritual healing begins. This is where true, unwaivering Self-confidence is born. This is the realm of miracles.

Wanting to transcend the ego takes courage, dedication and humility. It’s not an easy or popular route. At first, the ego thinks « yes, that’s what I want, that’s what I need to feel fulfilled», but this is a trap. It’s not about making our personal selves better, stronger or more powerful - although paradoxically, this often happens as a result of raising our level of consciousness. Disidentification from the ego is all about stripping away our programming and the limiting beliefs that hold us back as spiritual beings.

How is it done? By developing an awareness of what we really are; by surrendering negative emotions; by healing old wounds; by letting go of what holds us back; by opening our hearts and by humbly trusting the ever-present divine grace that guides us back to wholeness.

As difficult as it has been at times, this has been my journey for over two decades. I discovered that my entire life was essentially an illusion that kept me trapped in unecessary suffering. At first, I understood this with my mind, then, little by little, I experienced it through my heart. Because I have been through and continue to move through this process of spiritual surrendering on a daily basis, I am now able to hold that space for others to do the same thing. I do it by sharing a sacred space that includes creativity, some moments of silence, breathing, laughter, warm beverages and a whole lot of love.

Spirituality is not like working out at the gym. We cannot learn how to raise our level of consciousness by « doing » , or by simply trying to fix the problems our minds cling to. We have to allow ourselves to be. We have to find the courage to feel whatever comes up, as unpleasant as that might be sometimes. We have to learn how to be at peace with what is. It’s not enough to sit in meditation and chant mantras three times a week, because life happens outside of these bubbles of isolation. How do we react when things don’t go our way? Is the ego still completely running our internal programming outside of meditation class?

The good news is that every second of every day, as our life unfolds with its inevitable ups and downs, we can practice being more spiritually aware. We can allow ourselves to be what we truly are. We can wake up from the dream over and over again. Are you game?

If you are in the Edmonton area and would like to know more about the private sacred spaces I hold, you can reach me at consciouslivingsolutions (at) gmail dot com.


Warmly,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Who Is More Intelligent?

Life is but a dream. Just ask our Balsam poplar tree who has been producing these beautiful balls of fluffy cotton lately. One minute they are there, hanging from the branches like a sweet display of cotton candy, and the next they are broken apart and sent off to dance in the sky, swept away by a breeze that will ensure their reproduction. In just a few days, there will be no sign of these soft white creatures. They will have come and gone, served their purpose and returned to the earth. Everthing comes and goes, just like a dream.

What's the main difference beween us and the cotton balls? Essentially, we go through the same cycle of life, but they do it without resistance. They don't care if nobody notices them. They don't see themselves as separate from everything else. They have no expectations. They just go with the flow. They have a primal, innate wisdom -a knowing, that they don't "have a life" but they ARE life itself, just naturally doing what it does. We may be smarter than them, with our complex thinking processes, but they certainly don't suffer like we do, do they? So who's really more intelligent I wonder?

More and more, I am experiencing that it IS possible to live like that -free from the prison of our ego. But at first, I went through the process  kicking and screaming. To the ego, it seems absurd, ridiculous even to consider that everything we have carefully constructed -our so-called "life", our persona, our biography- are fundamentally complete illusions. When we are brave enough to let go of our thoughts, our beliefs and expectations, we discover the deep peace that the natural world has known all along. Isn't nature a wonderful teacher?

As long as we cling to this idea of who we think we are, we suffer. I find it helpful to keep asking  the question "what am I?" I don't look for an answer that comes from the mind, but instead from the body. I connect with that feeling of beingness, not just in a meditative setting, but in everyday life situations. What I discover is that I am dreaming! From that place of awareness, I go ahead and play my part in the drama of life. I plant the seeds I wish to harvest and I remove the weeds without having to get angry with them. Most of the time, I eat them, actually.

Wishing you a wonderful summer,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com

C'est quoi au juste, le succès?

I usually write my blog posts in English, but this week I wanted to share a very personal story that I happened to write en français. It's about my music career and how it led me down a difficult but beautiful path of awakening. I'd like to thank everyone who graciously offered to give me their grammatical and personal feedback on this story: Marie-Claude, Lucien, Jeannine, Gwénaëlle, Nevena, Clarisse et Yvon.

C'est quoi au juste, le succès?

À peine sortie des bras de Morphée, encore désincarnée entre deux mondes, il m’a murmuré d’un ton ferme : « Il est temps de quitter le confort d’Edmonton pour aller faire carrière en chanson à Montréal. » À cette époque, je lui obéissais religieusement, puisque j’étais encore incapable de distinguer sa voix de la mienne. Motivée par ses promesses de succès, d’aventure et de reconnaissance, j’ai fait mes bagages la gorge serrée, puis j’ai quitté le nid familial sans regarder en arrière.

Comme un bon gérant qui voyait clairement les escaliers à franchir pour arriver au sommet, il me poussait impitoyablement. Cela n’a pas été facile à Montréal. La solitude, le doute et la pauvreté s’accrochaient à moi comme des parasites importuns. Lorsque je rentrais à trois heures du matin – épuisée d’avoir chanté dans les bars enfumés pour quelques minables dollars – il m’assurait que mes efforts seraient bientôt récompensés de façon exponentielle.

Je voulais juste me sentir bien, être en paix, heureuse, quoi ! Il me fredonnait toujours le même refrain :

« Ton bonheur s’en vient, il approche à grands pas !

Bientôt, LA bonne personne te découvrira.

Fais connaître tes chansons à travers des concours.

Persévère et le succès viendra bien un jour. »

J’étais peut-être encore trop jeune pour remettre en question sa définition du succès, surtout qu’elle semblait être universellement acceptée : « Le fait d’obtenir une audience nombreuse et favorable, d’être connue du public. » J’étais si naïve que je le prenais pour ma bonne conscience. Lorsqu’il me promettait que le succès et la reconnaissance assureraient mon bien-être, je le croyais. J’ai donc persévéré à travers les orages.

Le beau temps est enfin arrivé au printemps 2003. J’ai gagné le gros lot : premier prix d’un concours international de chanson francophone à Paris. Soudainement, j’étais devenue quelqu’un. Cette sensation de soulagement profond, de fierté et d’accomplissement était fantasmagorique ! Dommage que mon extase n’ait duré que le temps d’une soirée bien arrosée au champagne. Dès le lendemain, ma nouvelle valeur perçue attirait les producteurs de disques comme la lumière attire les moustiques. Ce qui piquait ma curiosité, c’était par quels moyens ils prévoyaient me convertir en profit. Bien consciente de leur jeu, j’ai gardé mon sang-froid.

Cette semaine-là, à Paris, j’étais complètement misérable. Déstabilisée par mes émotions extrêmes, j’étais incapable de dormir, sans appétit et totalement désorientée. Je n’ai même pas eu la chance d’aller visiter ma copine, la grande Eiffel. « C’est cela, le succès ? » me suis-je demandé, en attendant en vain une réponse. C’est à ce moment là que j’ai commencé à douter de tout. Cette voix qui me flagellait en me promettant simultanément la gloire et le bonheur, était-ce vraiment ma conscience, ma bonne fée marraine ? J’avais suivi ses conseils à la lettre. Pourquoi, alors, ce « succès » tant attendu me causait-il autant de tourments ? Horrifiée à l’idée d’avoir aveuglément obéi à ce dictateur dans ma tête pendant tant d’années, je l’ai confronté : « Qui es-tu ? » Démasqué, il devint muet. Étais-je en train de devenir folle ?

De retour à Montréal, le précieux trophée Charles-Trenet  que j’avais délicatement emballé dans ma valise  était en morceaux - tout comme moi. L’anxiété devint ma nouvelle coloc. Elle me suivait partout et me tombait véritablement sur les nerfs ! Malgré tout, je peux remercier ma névrose de m’avoir incitée à faire un grand voyage intérieur. Ironiquement, c’est elle qui a fait germer en moi les premiers semis de lucidité et de sagacité. J’ai tout questionné. Qui était le tyran dans ma tête ? Moi, j’étais qui au juste ? C’était quoi, le bonheur ? Et le succès, lui ?

Je me suis perdue dans des livres qui m’ont révélé des secrets bouleversants. J’ai constaté à quel point j’avais vécu comme une somnambule enivrée par un état d’ignorance totale. Le tyran radotait encore, mais maintenant, je voyais son jeu. Machiavélique, il tentait de me séduire avec tout ce qui m’éloignerait d'un bien-être authentique et durable. Ma crédulité s'étant muée en discernement, je pouvais enfin entendre et observer cet imposteur sans devoir lui obéir comme un pantin. Peu à peu, j’ai réussi à baisser le volume de sa cacophonie d’insécurités et d’indignations incessantes. Comme le silence me soulageait !

Quelques mois après cet éveil brutal, j’étais encore troublée, tiraillée entre mes ambitions artistiques et spirituelles. J'étais encore sous l’emprise de mes vieux programmes et conditionnements de somnambule, cependant une force à la fois puissante et familière émergeait en moi. Suite à ce feu qui avait ravagé mes vieilles croyances, mon jardin intérieur était redevenu riche et fertile. Beaucoup de fleurs y ont poussé. L’inspiration coulait abondamment et donnait vie à des chansons infusées d’amour, de lumière et de liberté.

J’ignore exactement comment, mais je sentais avec certitude que j’allais être invitée à chanter dans plusieurs pays. Je n’étais plus poussée par la peur et le manque de l’imposteur, mais plutôt motivée par l’envie de partager mon nouveau bouquet de fleurs musicales. C’est peut-être cette nouvelle attitude confiante de laisser-aller qui a fait en sorte que ma prémonition s’est manifestée presque miraculeusement. Sans même leur en faire la demande, ce sont les ambassades canadiennes à l’étranger qui m’ont organisé une tournée internationale à faire mourir d’envie les artistes émergeants comme moi !

C’était complètement irréel ! Un rêve devenu réalité ! Un soir après l’autre, je me retrouvais sur la scène, en tête-à-tête intime avec un élégant piano à queue revêtu d'un smoking. J'invitais des centaines de spectateurs à entrer en résonance avec moi dans mon univers de mélodies éthérées. J’ignorais qu’il y avait autant de passionnés de la langue de Molière dans des pays comme la Chine, les Philippines, l’Arabie Saoudite, le Koweït, les Emirats Arabes Unis, la Jordanie,  le Viêt Nam et même la Syrie.

C’était en 2004, et j’avais l’impression d’avoir été insérée subitement dans la vie de quelqu’un d’autre. Je suis passée de l’anonymat total au Québec à la gloire soudaine à l’étranger : des fans hystériques, des bouquets floraux, des entrevues à la radio et à la télévision, des hôtels cinq étoiles, des chauffeurs privés et des invitations aux réceptions des différents ambassadeurs du Canada. C’était comme si cette tournée avait été conçue et manufacturée pour quelqu’un – la variable X –  qui allait temporairement jouer le rôle de « Star » à l’international. Curieusement, c’est moi qui ai obtenu le rôle ! C’était hallucinant !

Etre quelqu’un offrait certainement de nombreux bénéfices et avantages, mais la sonnerie imminente du dernier coup de minuit me hantait. Je savais bien que le retour à la réalité serait difficile, presque cruel, suite à cette tournée idyllique. Je ne m’attendais pas à ce que la transition de mon carrosse enchanté au métro de Montréal soit particulièrement agréable. Toutefois, ce qui me terrifiait le plus, c’était la réalisation que j’étais au summum de ma carrière musicale, et que dans seulement trois mois, j’allais devoir tout laisser tomber pour devenir… maman ! Mon prince était à mes côtés, mais cette tournure d’événements n’était pas prévue dans notre conte de fée. L’avenir était très incertain dans notre royaume.

Nourri par mon inquiétude grandissante, le tyran que j’avais temporairement réussi à taire s’est remis à crier : « Pas question d’abandonner ta carrière maintenant ! » Bébé grandissait en moi, tout comme mon amertume, ma résitance et ma peur. Du haut de mon apogée, j’ai perdu l’équilibre puis sombré dans les ténèbres du désespoir. Pendant des mois, je ne comprenais pas du tout ce qui m’arrivait. Ma seule certitude, c’était que je n’avais plus le contrôle sur ma vie. J’ai vraiment été mise à l’épreuve. Allais-je succomber aux désirs égoïstes du redoutable tyran, ou serais-je capable d’entendre la voix de ma sagesse intérieure ?

Éventuellement,  la lumière a chassé l’obscurité. Peu à peu, j’ai lâché prise. J’ai laissé tomber toutes mes idées préconçues, j’ai fait le deuil de ma carrière, je me suis donné la permission d’être personne, juste une maman. La maternité m’a arraché tous mes masques. Dénudée, j’ai laissé s’envoler le passé et toutes ces ambitions futures qui me rendaient profondément anxieuse. J'ai abandonné mon navire chaviré pour enfin me laisser emporter par le courant -sans veste de sauvetage. Il ne me restait que l’instant présent.

A ma grande surprise, j’ai découvert une paix intérieure et une joie de vivre absolument délicieuses ! Je pouvais faire confiance à cette force de vie bienveillante qui me protégeait et me guidait. J’avais tant d’amour pour mon adorable princesse que je n’avais plus le moindre désir de rechercher l’approbation des autres à travers des spectacles. Cette idée du succès me semblait tellement vide et superficielle dans mon nouvel état de quiétude amoureuse. Enfin, après de nombreuses années, j’ai finalement appris la leçon qui m’était destinée : le véritable succès se mesure par notre niveau de joie et de paix intérieure.

Aujourd’hui, je suis de retour à Edmonton. Le prince et moi vivons une vie paisible et joyeuse avec nos deux beaux enfants. J’espère pouvoir leur apprendre à reconnaître et à dompter leur tyran intérieur, parce que oui, nous en avons tous un ! Si on l’écoute, on peut tomber dans ses pièges de malheur. On peut passer notre vie à essayer d’être quelqu’un qui est supposément plus honorable, plus influent. On risque alors de chasser le succès aveuglément et de rechercher le bonheur à l’extérieur de soi. En réalité, nous sommes déjà ce que nous recherchons désespérément. Le trésor se trouve à l’intérieur et il est accessible à tous ici et maintenant.

Lise Villeneuve
www.lisevilleneuve.com

A Story About True Love (and chocolate)

For Valentine's Day, I thought it would be fun to share a little story I wrote for the Conscious Kids Mindfulness Program with you. It's a story about true love - a notion many of us mix up with attachment. Whether you have a partner or not on Valentine's Day, remember that Love is what you're made of, so there is no need to look for it outside of yourself. However, chocolate is one of those things that is harder to find within ;)

All jokes aside, I hope you enjoy this story!

A Lesson in True Love

Unfortunately, the town of Lonesome had the highest divorce rate on the planet (98%). The citizens of Lonesome had a meeting one day and agreed that something had to be done about this, for the sake of their children and grandchildren. One man had heard about a wonderful True Love teacher who worked in a nearby town called Mystic. Surprisingly, Mystic had the lowest divorce rate on the planet (7%).

The Lonesome man proposed “since the people in Mystic seem to have figured out how to make relationships last, maybe we should contact their True Love teacher and ask if he’d be willing to move here and help us. It sounds like there’s not much work left for him to do in Mystic anyway.”

The following week, this new teacher – Mr. Hawkins – was giving his first True Love lesson at Sacred Heart School in Lonesome. The walls and ceiling of his classroom were decorated with giant hearts, and there were many pictures of people posted everywhere. There were pictures of people hugging and looking happy together, pictures of people getting married, as well as pictures of people fighting and arguing.

He asked the class “can anyone tell me what love is?”

Maria raised her hand. “Love is an emotion we sometimes feel when we’re around someone we really, really like.”

“Who agrees with Maria?” Mr. Hawkins asked the class. “Raise your hand if you do.”

Every single person in the class raised their hands. “Wrong!” said Mr. Hawkins. “You are all wrong! Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!”

“Nice effort, Maria,” he continued. “What you said is exactly what most people in the world believe. It turns out that love is not an emotion at all. Repeat after me, class: love is not an emotion. Love is not an emotion. Love is not an emotion.”

At this point, the students thought Mr. Hawkins was a little strange. “Do you want to know what love is?” asked Mr. Hawkins. The students were unenthusiastic. He walked around the class with a box full of large rings and distributed them to every student.

To read the rest of this story from Conscious Kids, Lesson V, ****CLICK HERE****.

Thanks for reading, and lots of LOVE to you!

P.S. If you'd like more mindfulness stories for kids with practical activities, check out Conscious Kids. And if you receive too much chocolate, please send it my way.

Lise Villeneuve
www.lisevilleneuve.com

These May Look Like Kittens But...

There is such a beautiful, pure sweetness that shines through the eyes of a kitten. This is pure consciousness manifesting itself through physical form. The kittens haven't individuated themselves from this divine life force yet. The survival mechanisms and programs of the animal ego have not yet kicked in to create a sense of separation between themselves and "others". But it's just a matter of days now. This is just how things have evolved on our planet. However, the kittens will be just as cute with egos! :)

Thankfully, WE (thank you Yvon Loiselle for the correction) humans have arrived at a time where it is possible to transcend the very limiting programs of our ego. We no longer need to rely on the ego for survival. In fact, the ego holds us down and keeps us trapped and unhappy in so many ways. We now have the very real possibility to become aware of this and to live in a state of pure bliss. But we have to be willing to let go of everything.

When we were very young infants, we were totally free, just like those kittens. Unbounded. There was no "me." For a very brief time, there was just absolute peace, joy and freedom -regardless of our circumstances. We knew experientially that we were part of All that Is. We knew we were taken care of. We were not separate from Divinity itself. Deep down inside, we still remember this state of Unity. We crave it. We look for it everywhere. And we're still looking...

As we grew older, from babies to toddlers, our programming started to shape our views of reality. Now, most of us fully buy into the illusions of the physical world. We are completely invested in our individual personas. What if they weren't real?

Many of us will just continue to play the game until it just hurts too much to keep going. Then awakening will happen. The ego will be seen for what it is, and freedom will be the reward. It may take a few more lifetimes, but it will happen. It is our destiny.

To lighten things up a bit, can you spot the kitten in the picture above? :)

All that to say that the kittens (who are now 1 month old) are a good reminder that we are ALL beautiful manifestations of pure Divine essence. Their form -as adorable as it is- is nothing more than a temporary disguise. Just like our bodies. Consciousness takes many forms. In the end, Reality is formless.

With Love,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Just A Cruel Cosmic Joke?

It seems like a bit of a cruel cosmic joke to be born into this world as unified consciousness, then to grow egos that seem perfectly justified and socially acceptable, only to realize later in life that they are at the root of our deepest suffering. Then, once we become aware of our shackles, we commit ourselves to unlearning everything we have ever known to be real and meaningful. The little ‘separate self’ was just an illusion all along! We start to let go of the idea of ‘me’ and begin to let consciousness take up more space inside. Once again, just like when we were an infant, our life is no longer ‘ours’, but it flows effortlessly. We are at peace, we are free, we are “home”.

Lasting peace and freedom arise when we simply allow ourselves to Be who we truly have been right from the start. Who we truly are has nothing to do with our personality, our story, our thoughts, our emotions, our opinions, our deep conditionings or even our beliefs. Our egos prevent us from accepting and surrendering to our true identity because it threatens the very survival of our small, individual self. And who are we really? We are all part of the one unified consciousness. Nothing could be more empowering and terrifying than that!

“Home” is a state of being where our small self is no longer in control. When we are truly “home”, consciousness itself takes over, cleansing out all the remaining traces of the small, separate self that used to inhabit and restrict our being. We can finally feel at home when we wake up and recognize the illusion of ‘me and you’, ‘happy and unhappy’, ‘past and future’, ‘good and bad’, ‘success and failure’.

Once we realize that our small self was trapped in a world of superficial and limiting polarities, we can willingly surrender to who we truly are: consciousness. At this point, we are fully content being nobody. There is nothing to prove, nothing to fight for, nothing to gain, nothing to lose. We finally accept that we are complete simply by being. We finally stop creating suffering for ourselves and others. We are free from the drama of the world and our own minds. We are at peace. We are filled with joy. We are compassionate and loving. Isn’t that what we ultimately all want?

The truth is, at this stage in our evolution, arriving “home” is not likely to happen without an epic battle with the ego first.  The ego says “why on Earth would I want to become a nobody and give up all my attachments? I would get eaten alive in this world.” It’s true, there is so much letting go required, so much at stake for the little self. Our conditioning and our resistance run deep. “Home” seems utopian and unattainable. Yet at the same time, it’s within our reach right here, right now. We can only access it by allowing ourselves to be who we truly are. No amount of doing will show us the way back to simply being.

What do you think?

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

I Turned 40 and Almost Shaved My Head!

Yesterday I turned 40. Whatever, it's just a number. I can still be as immature as I want for the rest of my life :)

Seriously, turning 40 made me realize how easy it is to get attached and totally identified with our bodies, our looks, our hair, our sagging parts. I think this is especially challenging for women as we get older. We look at ourselves in the mirror, and whether we like what we see or not, we think to ourselves "that's me". But is it really? Only on a superficial level. I thought it would be a fun "detachment experiment" to chop off most of my hair myself, in the back yard. I was prepared to shave my head if it got too ugly, but thankfully, I didn't get that far.

The physical body is just the shell holding our higher Selves, but Mr. Ego trick us into buying the expensive anti-wrinkle creams because he convinces us that WHO we are is, in fact, the bones, muscles, organs and skin, and IF we make ourselves look better, we will feel better, receive more love and ultimately be happier people. Right? Wrong. Let's be honest, the true motivation behind anything we do to improve our appearance is to feel better, to receive more love and acceptance from others.

There's certainly nothing wrong with wanting those things, it's in our nature, but it's good to become aware of what we're really chasing when we push ourselves to extremes at the gym, when we try to artificially change our bodies or wish we looked different somehow. All these behaviours are driven by Mr. Ego who tells us we're not good enough to be loved just the way we are, therefore we need to change ourselves to be worthy and to feel better. But when does it ever end? When do we reach that state of lasting satisfaction?

What if instead of trying to fix / improve our physical appearance, we worked on our self-love and acceptance instead? What do you think would happen? If we became so content with who we are as a spiritual being and started to radiate love, peace and joy to others, don't you think our bodies would naturally start to look and feel better? Do you think that if we aligned ourselves with our heart and spirit, we would intuitively know what to eat? Of course! We would also exercise because it would bring us joy and make us feel good, we would know exactly what to do to heal ourselves, and our aging process would automatically slow down.

Does this scenario seem too good to be true? Well it's not! Our society is simply conditioned to want to change things from the outside, to fix the symptoms, not the root causes of anything. You intuitively know that any lasting change happens from the inside-out, don't you? It makes perfect sense, because it is our thoughts that materialize into matter.

Being 40 is just a concept, a thought. I choose to not let it condition my body with any preconceived notions of "what's supposed to happen when you reach that age." I will diligently keep working on noticing how my ego tries to convince me that I am my body. It's much simpler than that. I am.

Warmly,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Should We Slay Our Inner-Dragon?

I had fun colouring this mandala today as I was listening to Pema Chodron's CD "Walk the Walk". She was talking about learning to be gentle and kind with ourselves, because so many of us have such a harsh inner-critic inside. Sound familiar? She was also mentioning how important it is to learn to be alone with ourselves, to be still, so that we can observe our ego-mind, and see how it's at the root of our unhappiness and suffering. Now that I think about it, the colours I picked for the mandala remind me of a fire-spitting dragon, and from now on, I think that's how I'll picture the ego.

Most of us do just about anything we can to keep ourselves busy and distracted from our inner-tyrant. For many, sitting alone in stillness is pretty much the equivalent of torture. Why is that? Why is it so difficult and painful to face ourselves? Because we've become completely identified with our thoughts (which are predominantly negative) and our emotions. We believe that we ARE what we're thinking, we ARE what we're feeling, therefore when we sit there, and our dark, compulsive thoughts and feelings start to make our heads spin, we conclude that we must be bad, or very screwed up people.

Fundamentally, we're not bad or screwed up, we're just confused about our true identity. We're not the dragon, it just happens to have set up camp in our psyche. The way out of this nightmare is to face that dragon and to shed the light of consciousness onto it. We'll never be able to completely kill it off, but we can domesticate him. We can learn to observe it fearlessly, and it will gradually lose its power over us.

We're experts at either tip toeing around the dragon so that we don't wake him up, or keeping ourselves as far away from him as possible. In other words, we avoid our pain. It's understandable because our hectic, largely unconscious society encourages us to suppress a lot painful emotions in order to appear "functional" on the outside. Unfortunately, suppressed thoughts and emotions don't just vanish into thin air, they remain in our bodies and resurface over and over again until we are ready and able to heal them. When all our outside distractions dissolve, we are faced once again with our dragon, and these painful signals suddenly emerge from the core of our being.

A profound transformation happens when we realize that the dragon we were so terrified of was our friend, all along. He was simply trying to get our attention so that we could heal our wounds. He knew from the start that any pain we allow ourselves to feel (whether physical or emotional) is an indication of a part of us that wants to heal into consciousness. It takes great courage to face that pain, but if we can embrace it, understand it, love it and release it, we will break free from its shackles.

Warmly,

Lise
Health Coach / Reiki Master
www.lisevilleneuve.com

20 Signs That You Are Living in The Now

Thanks to Eckhart Tolle, we've all heard about the importance of living in the Now, but how many of us are actually able to fully stay present for most of our day? (besides cats and children!) I sure wasn't, even though I really grasped the concept mentally. How about you?

Lately, I find that I'm increasingly able to bring myself back to the Now for longer and longer periods, and I have to say that the feelings of well-being and empowerment that arise from being really present are pushing me to change the way I live even more. It's a little scary, I have to admit, because it essentially means nothing less than letting go of thousands of years' worth of collective conditioning, beliefs and socially approved behaviours that are all ego-driven. Nevertheless, I believe the time has come for us to make this quantum leap, we are ready. You are ready.

Having studied psychology, spirituality and holistic well-being for decades now, I am more convinced than ever that presence is the magic key we all seek. Fully entering and surrendering to the present moment is THE most important thing we can learn to free ourselves of our suffering and to experience true, lasting peace and joy. The beauty is that anyone can learn this, no matter what their past or future hold.

Living in the Now is such a simple concept, yet so very challenging, especially when our egos get in the way. We can certainly keep living our lives the old way, through identification with our ego, our personality, our image, our reputation, our separation from others, our story, but the price tag attached to this way of life is inevitably unhappiness and suffering.

Those of us who have suffered enough will gradually shift to a more enlightened way of life. But it requires courage, guts, effort and patience with yourself. You will be swimming against the very strong current of the majority. Sometimes you will get carried away in the waves, but you will always have another chance to turn around and swim towards that beautiful, peaceful island. Are you living in the now?

Here are 20 signs that you are shifting from an ego-based life towards living in a more awakened state in the Now:

1-You notice the voice in your head. You observe it with compassion and gradually, it gets quieter
2-You catch yourself thinking about the past or the future and you gently come back to the present
3-You forgive yourself when you get triggered and reactive, and you try again next time
4-You become more in tune with sensations in your body (emotions, discomfort, stress, hunger)
5-You notice your emotions and are able to release them without adding more mental noise to them
6-You accept what the moment brings you, even if that means resistance. You notice the resistance
7-You are less concerned with "doing" and more accepting of just "being"
8-You don't feel the need to talk as much, you become a better listener
9-Your personality, image, reputation and personal opinions become secondary
10-You don't need to be right all the time
11-You become more spontaneous and creative, you don't need to plan as much
12-You allow yourself to be curious, the world becomes your playground
13-You start to notice the aliveness all around you and it brings you lightness and joy
14-You give yourself permission to play and laugh
15-You feel drawn to nature, you increasingly enjoy silence and stillness
16-You become more loving, less judgemental towards yourself and others
17-You want to connect with others who understand the idea of Oneness
18-You become ok with your human ordinariness because you know you are a spiritual being
19-Your goals and ambitions change, you are drawn to things that bring you purpose and meaning
20-You see yourself as an extension of consciousness, not just your physical body and mind

Did I forget to mention any other important signs that demonstrate a growing presence? Don't be shy, add them to the comments below.

Warmly,

Lise Villeneuve
Creator of Conscious Kids and Conscious Health (try it for FREE!)
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Hitting Rock Bottom. Can You Relate?

I received this beautifully candid letter today (below). The author intended to share it with you on this blog. He's been going through some intensely difficult times and he had the courage to openly write about his experience and perspective. 

Writing is always extremely therapeutic, and it has the double benefit of creating connections -connections with people who are going through similar challenges and also connections with people who are able to offer words of support. 

What's amazing is that even if we never meet, or never even become aware of each other's existence, we are still all deeply connected to each other! Each of our individual perspectives alter our collective human experience. You may not know it, but the story below has already affected you on some profound level, and your personal story is also affecting others right now. Why? Because ultimately, we are all the One Consciousness, not just our individual bodies and stories. By relating to someone else's story, by sending them a thought of compassion, by understanding their pain and acknowledging that you too, have felt these emotions, you are actually nurturing your own self-love.

I leave you now with this brave tale filled with heartbreak, despair and hope. I know that you reading this story means the beginning of a new chapter for the author. May this inspire you to reflect upon your own story and empower you to rewrite your next chapter according to your heart's desires. You hold the pen!

Warmly,

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

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Since I can remember, it's been a struggle. Life was never the easiest when young, one of seven but so much younger than my other siblings, an empty house cold and unwelcoming, mother caring but burnt out, father hostile, a definite mistake on the human landscape as far as he was concerned. One that I paid for without realizing that my life was different from the other kids.

Growing up was an isolated experience. I did have great difficulty integrating with other kids and spent most of my time alone, harassed, maligned and bullied by it seemed everyone. I can clearly remember being afraid for most of my childhood, when high school came along it was to get even worse! It's only 4 years or so and so much was to change?

The age of 14 onwards was a turning point. Made some friends, avoided those I feared and got on with life. Leaving home was right up there in the to do list. Sports came as a surprise to me, I began martial arts and developed to the age of 16 into another guy entirely, knew my goals, had a plan.

Found a job locally in a garage, left home, began to really work at this thing called life, three jobs and money in my pocket, still alone, a little bit scared of the female form, unable to socialize in a way that mattered, needed to work at that. I began working nightclubs, doing my day job and working on the black for extra money. Life was good but still missing love.

Then by chance I became popular, gods knows why. I met some lovely ladies and in particular met one special person. Life was definitely changing, sex was fabulous, what had I been doing all this time without it! I was hooked on sex, women and lust, what a wonderful world we live in.

From the age 21 I was married, life was good, but not for long. Within 8 years its seemed I had attached a lot of responsibility to my life which was very uncomfortable, I realized this was not for me, old married life perceptions haunted me, mortgages, debts, kids, I would be my father ! NO WAY angry annoyed and bitter. Marriage over by unanimous default, loved that girl but could not live with her a pattern for the future ! If only I knew then what I know now.

Work filled my life, some highs, some lows. I was self employed, loved the independence and no complaints. As I grew older, sports were important, work was important and relationships were what I lived for. I loved too much? gave too much and left nothing for myself. Anything to avoid being lonely and alone. I had fabulous relationships, lovely girls, some more so on the outside than the inside, found love and lost it many times.

But still I felt insecure amongst others, uncomfortable and awkward. What's wrong with me? Little did I know that one day I would write this retrospective of myself.

I moved abroad, took my darling wife with me, seeking a new life for us in the sun. Had to leave my home, depressing, stuck and dead ended in an economy that was busted, business struggling, becoming very depressed with the position I was in.

I feared the move to end my self-employed life and the cutting of my arms and legs feeling it gave me. For some years my wife had been depressed deeply at times, she affected me down to the core, no amount of money, travel or material things helped, but she wanted sun at any price. I agreed so we left and headed to the Mediterranean. I worked my butt off contracting and missed my wife, my evenings, my weekends, my life! My self-esteem withered, worked in an industry of people whom I had nothing in common, made the best of it and suffered in silence. A nervous breakdown I think it's called. I knew I was losing everything in my life but what to do? Keep working, make money and get out of this game as soon as possible. Some plan,my spouse loved her life. A little lonely she said, but she had my fabulous dog and a few new friends?

Problem was what's next? I am 50 something and did not wish to spend years away from home as a lifestyle, nervous breakdown, stress and no help from my now very happy wife. She had money, no ties, a beautiful house, fancy car and men in her life with whom she could have fun. And I — was paying for it. This job was killing me, I had no sport, just pressure and a hole in my heart. I lost 22 kilos in weight! I needed to, but that was not the reason, I was very depressed, sad and lonely.

The end of my world hit hard, in January I came home to find all this out, quit my job and sat in an empty house alone in the middle of nowhere literally.

The house was spooky, half empty after the sale my wife conducted in secret whilst I worked. She played me well, became a new woman and ran off with some guy who would continue to pay for the lifestyle she craved. I loved her, still but divorced her, forced the issue and was shocked to hear that she thought I would never do it! I miss her, but knew she had to get out of my life, my decision not hers, we were toxic to each other.

Wow, I hit the floor hard, wished to die, cried buckets and for the first time in my life took all the time in the world to think and seek answers to the question. Why was I so sad and depressed? Why was I so insecure? What next? The phone was dead, I had so many sim cards people just gave up, which country code, when available etc, no one called, no one wrote, I was screwed?

Now 6 months later I leave for a new home, in a part of Europe where people live! A house of my own, my furniture, my car, my sanctuary. It's three weeks to move day and I can't stand sitting here any longer. For the past few months I have forced myself to get out! The house is haunted or cursed, not sure which. I travelled to Columbia, Cuba, Ibiza, UK and Turkey, UK. And now I think a short break to Palma sounds great from where I am sitting.

I lost my way many years ago, became subservient to my wife, a second class citizen, was made to feel inferior, uncultured, thick, unintelligent, lost respect for myself and like when I was young I let people walk all over me, use me and abuse me. I was angry, annoyed, panicked, every emotion in the same minute was the norm.

If you've read this far, your probably thinking what's the point of all of this? What did I learn about myself? How did I recover? What words of wisdom have I got for you to cling to?

I can say that I sought a different path. I promised myself to forget about work for a while and started to read self- help articles, I got social on line and one person told me of the book she was reading titled "Mindset Mastery". I bought it and went on holiday working through the new strangeness of manifestation, positive energy and divine guidance. I became religious (not) I wanted to believe, I needed a new path, and I can say it's working.

I read and wrote and synthesised my goals, changed my beliefs and carved my own path out of this hell hole that shelters me from rain. I can say that things started to happen. I met the most wonderful people, doors opened, green lights, I even got my bag from the baggage carousel number one on the belt! Synchronicity exists in my life.

My changing moment was standing in the hotel check-in in Cuba. I met the most significant person in my life ever, and she does not ask for anything from me. She changed my life in a week, mentored my new beliefs and listened to my horrible past experiences, advised and shared some very private issues and experiences with me. I felt that the Universe had answered me! Thank you so much.

I could write books about my thoughts and feelings but to be honest, all of us if faced with my kind of dilemma need help. Don't do this alone, speak to someone, seek alternatives, take time and learn to breathe slowly, it really works. Look upwards you'll feel better when you do.

I know that for myself I wished to die, I wished to cease to exist. Could neither go outside nor speak and in the end, I took time to accept that I have to be able to sit in the dark unafraid. I had to learn to talk to the spaces and fear not, as I would be ok, no monster was coming to eat me.

After this realization, I clung to the writings of the self-help gurus, met my mentor and began to plan for change. It was slower than expected, I usually don't ponder or consider too deeply, mostly due to peer pressure, debt and perceived responsibilities to my family and not to myself.

I'm not cured, I never will be. I have a sickness called acute depression, undiagnosed, hidden from the world and my doctor. Or do I ??????

My advice is don't be like me, don't take too much responsibility, consider yourself, love yourself ,forgive yourself, like yourself.

Luck is a big part of this also... or is it? You manifest your own future, I now believe. Choosing to be in a happy state or feeling is brought about by our own beliefs and expectations. If you believe it's going to be a bad day, it usually is.

It's also true to say that I shed a lot of my problems by moving, and leaving behind old friends who, in many cases, were not good for me, some actually capitalized on my kindness.

I believe so strongly now that I can make it! I even wish to change my name and build a new future without being followed or the subject of conversations about me, better to cut the past and look forward. I know when I move that I will have to integrate socially. Will do so by different name and build my new life around places and people I love to be with.

Lastly, I need a new job. I am working up some ideas, nothing solid yet, but the shoots are growing.

Most important, my sense of purpose must be served somehow. I still love the female form and seek that special person. I have formed new relationships but know that I will not allow anyone in my future to affect me so much as my former wife did. To be in love, in lust, be happy and seek adventure sure!

Thank you L for your love and kindness, without which I would no longer exist. Forever in your debt.

S.

Feeling Homesick

I must admit that lately I've been feeling a little lost. The more I commit myself to awakening, the less this physical world seems to make sense to me. I feel like our way of life here is completely backwards. From the moment we are born, we are constantly encouraged to move in the opposite direction of what brings us true peace, joy and happiness. The density of this ego-based planet is sometimes crushing. I guess that's why I decided to be here at this time, to help clean up the mess.

I know we all come from a place of Love and Unity, and sometimes I really miss Home, wherever that is. Does anyone else feel this longing? If you do, then you see the grand illusion of this physical reality as well. Thankfully, the number of people awakening these days is exponential, and together we will co-create a new world, a New Earth. We have to stay strong, united and have faith. If each one of us continues to work daily on our own awareness, our presence, our compassion for others, and if we learn to tame our minds and our negativity, this will transform the world little by little. It's already happening.

Half of me feels a little discouraged these days, yet the other half is cheering me on, trying to get more people on the consciousness team! Again, ego versus heart / spirit. I still regularly feel torn between the two polarities, especially when it comes to "fitting in" to society like everyone else. My ego has trouble accepting what my heart has been saying lately:

-"There is no need to push myself to do things that don't feel inspiring." My ego is trying to convince me that if I want to see results, it has to hurt a little, it has to be unpleasant, it has to be hard. But my heart knows that everything we create first comes from a clear intention, a thought, a feeling and THEN a physical manifestation. Taking action is one way to get things done, but not the only and easiest one. Yet, sometimes when I'm not "doing", I still feel guilty.

-"There is no need for elaborate conversations between human beings." My heart doesn't have much to say, except for "I hear you, I understand you, I love you." All the little stories of where I was, who I was, what I'm planning, what happened, what I know...etc are really just a variety of scripts written by my ego. They might be "interesting" to other egos, but increasingly, I just don't feel like opening my mouth. My ego is telling me how boring and awkward I am because I have nothing to say. However, my heart is all ears.

-"There is nothing wrong with being ordinary and living a simple, uneventful life." If I can learn to be perfectly content in each moment, no matter what circumstances I'm placed in, then I've reached my purpose on this Earth. To my heart, this is Ultimate success. Of course, my ego tells me that I should strive to "be someone", to "accomplish things", to have an exciting life. If those things happen along the journey, then great, but they are not the destination programmed in my internal GPS. Often times, we trick ourselves into believing that we will feel SO much better when...if....with...fill in the blanks. Really? I don't buy into that! The only place we can truly find lasting joy, love, peace and happiness is within, through total acceptance of the Now.

Well, I have to say I feel better already! How do you feel these days? Do you share some of my views? Do you have a completely different perspective? I would love to hear from you, so don't be shy!

Warmly,

Lise
Health Coach / Reiki Master
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Do You Want Peace, or a Roller Coaster Ride?

Are you feeling like you're on top of the world right now? I hate to burst your bubble, but what goes up must come down. Reversely, if you're currently feeling in the dumps, it's just a matter of time until you dust yourself off and reach new, blissful heights. Some of us experience extreme variations of these polarities, while others have more moderate highs and lows on the roller coaster of life. Until we're able to transcend the illusion of duality -an illusion that has us convinced that we're trapped in an unpredictable world of polarities- we will stay on this roller coaster ride, and lasting peace will remain out of reach.

Let's face it, many of us like the ride. It's thrilling, it's entertaining, it's distracting. Peace sounds rather boring. Why not take a chance and fall madly in love with someone, even if that means that we may have to experience excruciatingly painful heartbreak down the road? Why not take a financial risk and launch the business of our dreams, even if that means we make ourselves vulnerable, we put everything on the line and even flirt with the very real possibility of bankruptcy? Well, I'm not saying not to do those things. Life is an adventure, and if you never take any chances, or prevent yourself from feeling anything, you might as well be dead.

However, there is a way to have it all. You can explore the highs and lows of this world without actually being on the out-of-control-roller-coaster. That's right, you can fully experience the complete spectrum of emotions that come from both the dark and light sides of your persona, while still being in a state of lasting peace. No, I'm not trying to sell you drugs. I'm simply describing yet another benefit of becoming more aware, or conscious.

Consciousness transcends the world of ego that is often at the root of our extreme emotions. Instead of remaining completely identified with our emotions -I AM my pain, my joy, my anger, my excitement- we begin to observe our emotions from a more detached perspective -I feel the anxiety, I notice the anger moving inside me, I observe how this jealousy is creating compulsive thoughts, I see how this feeling of positive anticipation energizes me. It may take us decades before we realize that we're getting a little dizzy from the ride and we'd like to give peace a chance. When we've finally had enough of the drama, then the curtain rises and real magic starts to happen in our lives.

Once we see that we're in fact the writers, producers and actors of our life script, we can begin to enjoy our movie from a clearer perspective instead of being totally lost in the roles we've assigned ourselves on some higher level. Instead of getting carried away by our reactions, we can pause the movie, observe what's happening and take a breath. Once we master the art of being the witness, lasting peace becomes our reward.

If we're able to rise above the polarities of this fear-based world, even for just a moment, we'll understand that we come from a place where only love is real. This week, see if you can practice being the witness of what's happening inside and outside of you. No judgements, no guilt, no shame, no resistance, just observe what's going on. See what happens...

Warmly,

Lise
Creator of Conscious Kids and Conscious Health
www.lisevilleneuve.com

I Feel Completely Inadequate...

Disclaimer:

I hope I'm not getting too annoying with the increasing frequency of my blogging, but lately the inspiration has been pouring out of me, so I'm just allowing it to take form here. I really do enjoy writing, despite the fact that English is my second language and words don't always come as easily as French. Yet, something is pushing me to continue in this direction right now.

I want to take this time to thank you for being here, whoever you are! I really have no clue who reads my posts, all I know is that the numbers are increasing daily and I'm honoured that you're here. So don't be shy to contact me directly if you feel inclined to, I'd love to hear from you! (my contact info is on www.lisevilleneuve.com or you can post comments directly on this blog.)

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I Feel Completely Inadequate...

After having worked with many different people as a coach / counsellor, I can say with certainty that most of us feel like we are inadequate, myself included. We feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with us. We just don't fit in, we never have, and we're afraid that sooner or later, someone will figure us out! So what do we do? In order to avoid facing this threatening feeling of lack and these dark emotions that rest at the core of our being, we run like hell. Your ego is probably denying this right now!

Many of us spend our entire lives running away from our true, whole, Selves, because we (our egos) believe that we are not enough and never will be. Bullshit. We run from the pain of our past that we refuse to feel and instead bury deep inside, naively hoping that it will never resurface. We are experts at keeping ourselves distracted from our inner-world by finding something, anything to DO. Standing still is not an option because once our mind gets bored, it starts to wander into our forbidden zones. Being alone often presents the same threat. Does this sound familiar to you?

From this false premise that we are not good enough just as human beings, we build a lifetime of protective layers -such as the roles we hide behind, the career that defines us, the daily dramas that allow us to point the finger out there, the various successes that make us feel like we are temporarily important. But do they really make us feel like we're worthy? For how long? The ego is never fully satisfied. Before we know it, we're craving the next new thing, thrill, relationship...etc. There's nothing wrong with wanting these things, but few of us realize WHY we really want them. If we're brutally honest, we'll see that it's to keep ourselves distracted from this deep, unconscious belief that we're simply inadequate. Maybe by doing more, by being more, we'll feel better someday? What will it take, what will you have to do to finally get there? When will it be enough?

If we want to feel happy and at peace with ourselves, the first step is to realize that we've probably been looking in the wrong direction -outward. We have to come back to those disowned parts of ourselves and gently embrace them again. We have to find the courage to face our demons from the past. Emotions get stored in the body and can turn into discomfort or disease if they are not released. The truth is, we are already whole and worthy right now, even with all our imperfections. Don't let the ego fool you! The bulk of our healing work has to do with peeling off our multiple protective layers and allowing ourselves to feel ALL our emotions -especially the unpleasant, frightening ones.

So whenever you hear that little voice that pressures you to DO more, BE more, GET more, KNOW more, just tell it to ph*que off. Pardon my French. If whatever you desire is coming from a place of passion, enthusiasm, and joy, then that's your heart speaking to you. Go for it! You are beautiful just the way you are. Always remember that.

Warmly,

Lise
Health Coach / Reiki Master
www.lisevilleneuve.com