Confessions of a Homeschooling Mama

Yikes! We're about to dive into our seventh year of homeschooling next week! I absolutely LOVE this lifestyle and truly believe it was one of the greatest and most empowering choices we could have made for our family.

Emma is starting grade 9 and Théo is now in grade 4. They are both receiving all their education en français. Over the years, we have developed a system that really works for us, and a wonderful support network of local friends and other homeschooling families has organically grown around us, enriching our journey along the way. Knowing where to find the best resources and educational materials has made the task of planning each academic year much less daunting.

Homeschooling allows us to integrate education as a fun and natural part of a balanced life without having to compromise our physical or emotional well-being. In our household, learning happens all the time, and it's associated with feelings of joy, passion, enthusiasm, curiosity and creativity, as opposed to stress, pressure, competition, anxiety and resistance.

I am very grateful for the flexibility we have in our schedule that allows the kids to self-regulate their moods by trusting their inner-guidance system, or emotions. Nobody can perform like a robot! Sometimes, we're just not in the right state of mind to learn anything, and that's OK. Other times, creativity flows through us like a raging river and we could write an entire play, or a song, or paint the Mona Lisa all over again. Although we do have a weekly schedule, the kids are always encouraged to follow their hearts and honour their true feelings.We make a point of spending lots of time outdoors too. The kids know more about gardening and plants than I ever did at their age.

Every day is not always smooth and perfect, because life naturally has its ups and downs. That's one of the things I love the most about homeschooling: we can take the time to allow and work through the tough emotions, the resistance and the negative thoughts when they show up, because they will, and they are welcome here. In fact, they are healthy, whereas suppressing, repressing or projecting negative thoughts and feelings are extremely unhealthy strategies, but they are often used unconsciously as coping mechanisms when there is no room for an alternative. Releasing or dealing with negativity directly is generally frowned upon or considered too "disruptive" at school or at work, so we learn to tuck it into our little box until it busts open again by the next unpredictable trigger.

In our home, there is space for imperfections and disruptions. Actually, some of the greatest learning happens when we work through our tough, uncomfortable emotions. Once these are understood, surrendered and released, magic happens. Boundaries are removed. Fears are overcome. Energy, joy and lightness return. Chez nous, holistic well-being is valued over academic perfection. Individuality and curiosity are encouraged through a curriculum that is flexible and adapted to a unique child, not a system. Compassion, mindfulness and kindness are taught and valued over popularity, or conforming to the current norm or trend.

The purpose here is not to criticize the actual education system, as it is simply a by-product of our current society and its values. We're all doing the best we can right now. I know many wonderful teachers who give their hearts and souls to their students daily. Many children thrive in schools, and as the world becomes more conscious, I believe our social structures will radically change as well. In the meantime, I am grateful to have the option to enjoy this very special time with my kids.

Simply watching the daily news is enough to see that we live in a world that values productivity and relentless hard work above joy, well-being and inner-peace; competition over sharing and cooperation; success over compassion and mindfulness; materialism over spirituality. There is hope for the future, as we are changing it this very instant with our collective thoughts and intentions. But are we aware of this? Are our children aware of the power they hold?

Here, in our humble home and school, we learn that the most effective and direct way to change the world is to start by changing ourselves first -to fully embody the changes we wish to see outside of ourselves-, as Gandhi expressed so eloquently. So each day, we learn with love, with presence, with patience and forgiveness. We learn to love and accept ourselves fully so that we may love others unconditionally. We aim to raise our level of consciousness so that the world may also become a wee bit more aware and loving. Class is never dismissed at our school of life. Thanks for reading!

P.S. I recently wrote about emotional intelligence and self-regulation in a printable document called "Dealing with Strong Negative Emotions: A Guide for Parents and Teachers." It is free to download on my website.

All the best,

Lise Villeneuve
Creator of Conscious Kids (aussi disponible en français!)
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Nobody Ever Taught Me THAT In School...

School's back in full gear for many of us. Believe it or not, every morning when I wake up, I feel extremely grateful to have the opportunity to home school my kids. I'm not going to lie, we don't like being rushed in the morning! We're now starting our 5th homeschooling year and I feel like we're really starting to get the hang of it. We know what works for our family, and we're more confident about this alternative way of life.

In anticipation of all the people who will be asking the kids 'What school do you go to?' this year, I think we will just call ourselves L'Académie Francophone Villeneuve-Carver. Sounds legitimate, right? That should at least reduce the number of awkward conversations with cashiers who think homeschooling is only for hillbillies. But hey, this post is not really about homeschooling. It's about the Art of living.

I wish that someone had taught me about the Art of living a happy, fulfilling life when I was a kid! I learned plenty of practical, interesting facts in school and University, but like the majority of us, I had to figure out the  most important questions on my own: What makes us truly happy? What's really important in life? What can we do on a daily basis to create a fulfilling and meaningful life? How do our thoughts matter? Where's the nearest Starbucks? Good, you're still paying attention.

The bottom line is, school didn't teach me that happiness is a choice I make every day. Did it teach you that? Maybe I just went to bad schools. Lol. I just felt like I had to go to school and things were largely out of my control. I never knew that I was creating my reality with my thoughts. I didn't know that my emotions were my inner-compass and that I could wilfully move myself up the vibrational scale of emotions. Nobody ever taught me that I would eventually get what I focused on, even if I was focusing on what I didn't want! If I had known these things, I would probably have felt much more empowered and confident. Thankfully, times have changed and these notions are now becoming more widespread, even in some schools.

Back to homeschooling for a minute. One of the things I love about it is that I can sneak in some of these 'Art of living' notions when challenges come up with the kids - because they always do- especially during school time! When the kids get frustrated or discouraged, I can immediately intervene and help them become more aware of the thought patterns that are creating their negative emotions. This helps them keep things in perspective, and it may prevent really bad habits from eventually forming. I can remind them to focus on what they wish to reinforce in their lives.

Education is super important, and it becomes even more powerful when it's combined with a growing self-awareness. As their teacher, I get to practice teaching mindfully each day, and that's a real gift!

Here are some of our rules at L'Académie Francophone Villeneuve-Carver:

Teachers:
1. Thou shall stop teaching immediately if you are unable to give loving, compassionate energy.
2. Thou shall stop teaching your lesson if there is no sense of joy, play and wonder in it.
3. Thou shall remember: your energy sets the tone. Be in the moment. Breathe.

Students:
1. Happiness is a choice you make every day. You are in control.
2. Your thoughts create your emotions. Choose your thoughts wisely.
3. You get what you focus on, so focus on what you want, not what you don't want!
4. You are the creator of your own reality. Your intentions are powerful.
5. Negative emotions tell you you're out of alignment. Raise your vibration!

Wishing you a wonderfully mindful school year!

Lise Villeneuve
Creator of Conscious Kids -downloadable mindfulness stories & activities
Get your free mindfulness card deck here
www.lisevilleneuve.com

My Consciousness Boot Camp

This week was such a special treat for me, I feel very grateful. But first, let me describe what a "normal" week looks like around here.

A typical day for me is usually centered around my kids. I wake up when they do, prepare breakfast, guide them with their lessons (we homeschool year round), then I send them outside to play with the kids from the school across the street while I usually do some gardening (or shovelling), I prepare lunch, engage in various other creative / educational activities or outings in the afternoon, and then, if he's in town, daddy comes home and we shift into the evening routine. I love the flexibility we have, and I do try to fit in some time for writing, meditation and reading whenever I can.

The most important things I want to teach the kids don't come from books. I wish for them to become self-aware -to be able to understand, witness and self-regulate their shifting emotions. I want to give them freedom to follow their creative impulses and their natural curiosity. I want them to know that it's ok to trust and follow their inner-wisdom, their intuition and their spirit. They are encouraged to play, to be spontaneous, to laugh and to experience joy in all its colourful forms.

It is by filling their own hearts with overflowing love that they naturally want to extend this loving-kindness to others, regardless of their age, race, physical appearance or personality. I try my hardest to teach presence and awareness by example, and I hope that someday they will understand that their outer world is merely a reflection of their inner-essence. In short, what they are learning right now is how to prepare their inner-landscape for maximal growth. Topics like preparing the soil, selecting the right seeds, weeding, fertilizing, watering and dealing with pests are all on our conscious homeschooling curriculum!

As fun and varied as it is, our daily routine can get a little exhausting at times. What I find the most challenging is finding the necessary time / space to allow myself to get recentered and grounded in my own awareness. The kids have unlimited amounts of energy and they are like little buzzing bees swarming around me all day long with various requests, concerns and needs. If I want to stay calm and untriggered amidst the storms, I have to constantly wake myself up and recognize that children have developing egos that are by nature, unconscious. If I am lost in my own unconsciousness, things can quickly get ugly. In this sense, parenting is an extremely effective spiritual practice, because we as parents get immediate feedback when we become too identified with our ego-minds. I know, it's not a glamorous process...

The thing is, if I don't give myself that necessary time and space to breathe, meditate, to get a clear perspective and recharge my energy, my consciousness battery quickly gets depleted and I'm not as effective as a parent. However, when I get to strengthen my consciousness practice on my own -without the constant triggers and challenges from the kids- it gets stronger and more anchored in my being. Just like a muscle, we need to train our awareness gradually and turn it into a habit so that we'll eventually be able to take on more unconscious "weight" from the world all around us.

That being said, I've just had the incredible luxury of having an entire week to myself! Rob and the kids went to the cabin in Saskatchewan and I gave myself an intensive consciousness training boot camp! It's been absolutely wonderful. At first I thought "what will I do with all this time?" but it felt like time stopped completely. I read, meditated, exercised, contemplated, listened to inspiring audio programs, watched consciousness-related videos, coloured mandalas and just did whatever felt right in the moment. I allowed myself to be spontaneous, trust my intuition and live from the heart. This is the first time in my life I have been able to experience living this way, (completely alone) with such joy, for an entire week. I feel fully renewed and grateful. My babies are coming home in a few hours, I can't wait to see them!!!!!

If you can give yourself even just 15 minutes a day to breathe, meditate and become aware of your thoughts, you will feel the immediate and long-term benefits. Lock yourself in the bathroom if you need to, it's worth it!

Warmly,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Are You A Consciousness Coach?

Holà! Bonjour! Hello! I just recently created the Conscious Living Solutions page on Facebook and I am utterly THRILLED to see we are already at 239 members in just a few days! It's so encouraging to see how many people are awakening to their true essence. Being part of this growing community of inspired souls sure makes my journey towards living in a more conscious way less lonely! Thanks for being here. If you'd like to know more about me, please visit my website www.lisevilleneuve.com .

I think I'm going to have to learn Spanish because SO many of you are from Mexico! Well, that could take a while! Perhaps I should flee the Canadian winter and go take a crash course in Cancun? That sure would be nice!

Another large percentage of our members are from the Institute for Integrative Nutrition where I am currently studying to become a Health Coach. Well, Deepak Chopra said it and I truly believe it...the long-term solution to health is awareness! Becoming more aware naturally leads to a healthier lifestyle. It's like you know exactly what you have to do and it almost becomes effortless because you are in alignment with Being. Has anyone experienced this? I'd love to hear your stories so don't be shy about sharing them!

This "alignment" is what naturally led to me to homeschool my kids. Now I am able to really be present for them and we enjoy being with each other so much. I feel blessed to spend this precious time with them every day. It is more awareness that also got ME to cook (that, in itself was a miracle, just ask my husband!). The correlation between what we put in our body and how we feel everyday is so obvious, yet many of us still wonder why we experience chronic fatigue and illness. Part of the problem is education. People today are confused about what is truly healthy, and it's not their fault, they get conflicting messages from corporations interested in profit, not health. Also, the levels of pollutants in the air, water and soil make things even more challenging. 

Dear fellow students from the IIN, this is where we come in. As you know, we are equipped with the necessary tools to guide others towards a healthier lifestyle. But it's not just about "eat this, don't eat that, do this, don't do that". It's the combination of the information we have been given at the IIN, with deep AWARENESS, that have the power to radically transform lives. Consciousness coaches will change the world inside out.

Warmly,

Lise Villeneuve
www.lisevilleneuve.com
Conscious Living Solutions (click "Like" to join)

My Obsessive-Compulsive Need For Menus...

My husband works out of town a lot, especially during the warmer months. Frequently, he leaves for weeks at a time, sometimes coming home on the weekend, sometimes not. When we first got married and he was a student, he did almost all the cooking at home. He's a phenomenal cook, able to whip up almost anything, including typical dishes from any country. How intimidating is that for someone like me who, for many years, specialized in Kraft Dinner and sandwiches? My non-existent cooking skills were not really an issue...until we had kids! I just couldn't feed my kids the crap I was eating. So, when Rob was home, he did the cooking and everyone was happy and healthy. But then he started going on more and more trips, for longer and longer periods, and I had to get my act together in the kitchen!

Needless to say, being in charge of all meals for several days or more was extremely challenging and stressful for me! The way I reduced my stress and gained control of the situation was by planning, planning, planning. I remember making menu plans for 14 days on large white pieces of paper I had taped to the walls in our apartment in Montreal! I had also added my obligations, activities, notes, projects...etc, to these wall posters, making them look like graffiti. Often, the items on the menu were "sushi from the grocery store", "smoked salmon, bagels and cream cheese with capers", "a roasted chicken" from the store. I certainly was no Martha Stewart! Anyway, this method allowed me to cope. 

At the time I thought this was the only way. Today I realize that although there is some merit in planning menus in an obsessive-compulsive kind of way (such as minimizing trips to the grocery store or sticking to a specific diet), it just feels HEAVY. Having to follow those "instructions" like a to-do list was no fun at all! And what about following the body's natural cravings on a certain day? Our body doesn't just crave random foods, it guides us towards the nutrients we actually need (however, this rule doesn't apply to cravings for chips and chocolate...)

When Rob leaves, I now leave the menus behind. I just play it by ear, go with the flow, and that feels much lighter. It leaves space for creativity and inspiration in the kitchen, and I like that! I must say I've improved tremendously dans la cuisine, too. It took some time to get there, but now I make almost everything from scratch, including milling the raw almonds to make flour! It's all about feeling confident that I CAN make some culinary magic happen and even have some fun doing it. Thinking of my family and the nutrition I am able to provide them really motivates me. Cooking doesn't, and shouldn't have to be complicated. If we make mistakes, oh well, there's always cereal as a back-up plan!

Warmly,

Lise

www.lisevilleneuve.com

A New Business Idea...Out Of The Blue!

Creativity is truly mysterious. I believe we are all creative, but creativity doesn't just willingly come out of our brains, it flows through us when we open ourselves up to it. We channel creative energy when we quiet our minds and allow it to inspire our souls. We really can't force it, we can only make more space for it to enter our awareness.

Personally, I've noticed that before a truly creative idea comes to me, I go through a period of chaos. By chaos I mean that my thoughts are scattered, my energy is unfocused, I feel a general sense of restlessness in my life, like I can't control things despite feeling like a big change is coming. I suddenly need more space and quiet time, even more sleep. Well, I just experienced that unsettling chaos a couple days ago, and I had no idea the outcome of it would be... a new business! Conscious Living Solutions was born...just like that! 

It's really quite strange how this came about. It's as though I can't explain what's going on in my brain, only that a bunch of ideas, feelings, emotions and desires need to get consolidated somehow. That's where the creativity comes in. Boom! It suddenly, unexpectedly spits out a 'solution', when I never really knew what the 'problem' was. 

It's not like I thought "I really need to think of a new business idea." I was quite content with my current status as a student, future Health Coach and homeschooling mother. It's not until Conscious Living Solutions came to me in a flash that I started to analyse what happened in my brain to determine exactly how this idea was born. I was then able to put into words the 'problem', or question that was bothering me : "how can I live in a more conscious way on a daily basis and how can I inspire my children and others to accelerate the evolution in consciousness our world so desperately needs?"

I confess, I have no business plan, I'm just going to follow my heart day by day and allow that magical creativity to lead the way into a more conscious way of life for myself and others. Your feedback / ideas / comments are always appreciated.

Warmly,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com

The Best Christmas Present...

It snowed for two days straight here in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada. The fluffy snowflakes were dancing around the sky joyously. I had the pleasure of watching this beautiful display with my two little elves from the warmth of our living room. We listened to classical music while cuddling under a soft brown blanket. Time stopped as we lost ourselves in these precious moments together. But let's back up...

My daughter (9 years) called me from school on Wednesday shortly after lunch. She was crying over the phone "maman, je suis malade, peux-tu venir me chercher?". Translation: "mom, I'm sick, can you pick me up?" My heart immediately went out to her and I drove to her school with my son (4 years) as fast as I could. The roads were treacherous, we saw a car that had just smashed into a tree on the way there. Emma came out of school looking pale and feverish. When we finally got home after swerving here and there, Emma put herself to bed and slept for 6 straight hours until I woke her up at 9 pm to see if she wanted to have some supper. I told her I had no doubt she was really sick because it's only in these extreme circumstances that she ever wants to sleep this much! She giggled and agreed to eat something.

On Thursday, she felt a little better but still needed to rest. We cancelled my son's activities for the day (Indoor Playground in the morning, Preschool in the afternoon). Then, we let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. Staring into the distance, my heart started to fill with love and gratitude. Gratitude for not having to step out into the frigid air. Gratitude for not having to drive hurriedly to be on time somewhere. Gratitude for Emma's health that was improving. Gratitude for the fun we had making Christmas ornaments together. Gratitude for the warm, delicious smell coming from the oven (apple crisp). Deep gratitude for these beautiful, inspiring, enlightened little beings more commonly referred to as "our children" that remind us how to truly live in the present. I'm so very thankful that I get to spend all this time with them, and I just can't wait to start homeschooling in January 2014! What could be more important than spending quality time with our little ones and showing them how much we love them? Nobody knows how much time we will have to offer this priceless gift to our loved ones. They deserve to know how incredibly special they ARE, regardless of what they DO / accomplish (or don't do). 

That goes for us adults too, by the way. Can we learn to love ourselves just as we are, without judging what we consider to be success or failure? Can we offer ourselves true compassion, just like the one we so easily show our children? In this whirlwind of activities before Christmas, perhaps the biggest gift we can give ourselves and our close ones is just to stop, breathe, watch the snow flakes twirl around and be at peace, just for a moment. Can we find our inner joy, just for a second? Can we let love radiate out of our beings, even if it just cracks out as a shy smile? Can we be grateful for something today? Gratitude is truly the gift that keeps on giving. Why not unwrap it in the present?

Warmly,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com