Warning: this is going to be a venting blog. And yes, probably the last one I write about our five kittens. Someone asked me if I would be willing to experience having kittens in our home all over again. My answer to that would be an unequivocal yes...IF it were not for one major annoyance.
What annoyance was that? Cleaning the litter? Nope. The kittens were no bother at all. Taking care of them was effortless. Believe it or not, it's the humans wanting to adopt them who have been our biggest challenge. This has been frustrating beyond words.
Don't get me wrong, as of now, all the kittens have good homes to go to. Their owners are kind, generous, trustworthy individuals. But it's taken a LOT of effort to find reliable people. I recently had to re-home two of the kittens because people either broke their commitment at the last second or they demanded to have the babies before they were promised and ready.
Right from the start, I have been very clear about when the kittens would be ready for adoption: at twelve weeks of age. Some people think all kittens are automatically weaned and ready to go at eight weeks, but it's clearly not the case with this litter.
Understandably, everyone is eager to get their kitten as soon as possible, but it's truly disappointing to see how many people put their own needs and wants before those of the animals -as though they were some kind of toy or accessory. These demanding people showed their true colours and it was a good thing, because our sweet kittens didn't end up in their claws. Meow.
As you can see, this has stirred up a lot of frustration and irritation inside me. I have come to accept that any negative emotion that surfaces does so because of an internal overload. In other words, the "bad" cat owners are not the source of my anger, they are merely the triggers of this already present anger that had been suppressed or repressed unconsciously. This trigger gave me an opportunity to become more aware of my pent-up store of anger. I guess I was like a pressure-cooker just waiting for the perfect opportunity to release steam. I feel much better now.
What's amazing is that when we constantly surrender and let go of our negative emotions as they arise, it becomes impossible for anyone or anything to "make" us angry, or sad, or frustrated, or anything. Then we are free to solve our problems with a clear mind, instead of having to deal with the emotional mess we carry inside.
If you'd like to know more about the mechanism of letting go, I highly recommend the book Letting Go, by Dr. David Hawkins.
With Love,
Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com
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ReplyDeleteHello Richard,
DeleteWell I’m glad you are willing to talk about this issue openly. As I mentioned in my blog, this frustrating circumstance has allowed me to learn and to grow. I am sincerely grateful for that. That’s what this blog is all about. I take full responsibility for the anger and the irritation that I have been carrying inside. You breaking your commitment to adopt our kitten at the last second was just a trigger –not the root or the cause- of my anger. When you texted me a picture of your new cat out of the blue, after assuring me for weeks that you were “100% certain about adopting Zelda” and you even had us change her name to Simi, this brought up dormant anger to the surface. This was in fact an opportunity for me to become more aware of this anger, an opportunity to let it go. We are programmed to instantly blame others to justify our negative feelings, but the truth is, nobody can make us feel anything unless those emotions are already present within us. So thank you for that. Now I was wondering if you were open to learn from this experience as well? Since you read and replied to my blog, I’m going to assume that you are.
It’s true that many pets get euthanized each year. That’s very unfortunate, but not the issue here. I think it’s important to be honest with ourselves. This story is about breaking a promise, a commitment. You know I have worked hard to ensure that each kitten ends up in a loving, forever home. It’s when people commit to adopting them and then change their minds at the last second that their odds of getting euthanized increase, is it not?
You replied to my ad on Kijiji, and the conditions of Zelda’s adoption were very clear right from the start. No surprises, no changes. Zelda was offered to you at no cost, and if you recall, she was not even supposed to be available until early February. I know you were very eager –requesting pictures of her every few days and asking many questions about what she would need – so I said I was open to the possibility of letting you take her home earlier ***if she was ready to go***. As you know, she is 10 ½ weeks and still drinking milk with her mom. Correct me if I’m wrong, but you wanted her at ten weeks, period. Weaned or not.
Furthermore, I made it abundantly clear that all our kittens were expected to be spayed and neutered by their owners. You agreed to these conditions back in November, knowing full well that other cats are always looking for homes at the SPCA. You promised to take care of Simi, until you decided that you just couldn’t wait any more. So you deleted all the pictures you posted of her from your FB account, blocked me off so I wouldn’t notice, adopted another cat, and when I texted you another picture of Simi, you casually replied with a picture of your new cat.
This has nothing to do with the Humane Society, it has everything to do with breaking a commitment because of impatience. I just hope you see that, Richard. I felt a little used in the process, but I forgive you, and I sincerely hope you enjoy Cleo. Zelda has a wonderful home now.
Lise
Yes people are infuriating and irresponsible. I guess it’s my turn to vent and to express how irresponsible people really are with their pet ownership.
ReplyDeleteTwo years ago in 2015 a total of 15341 cats were euthanized \destroyed in Canada alone. Fortunately a 21 percent decrease from previous years totals where I have read being as high as 27716.
I'm sure that if you research you could fine the totals for 2016
Here is the link to the site:
http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/toronto/adoption-up-euthanasia-down-report-1.3908436
Compare this to 1716 dogs.
I was one of the said adoptees of Simi. I wished to provide her a loving home home at 10 weeks and I was denied that opportunity. I’m grateful I made that decision.
I instead went to the Edmonton Humane Society and saved a life of a little kitten she is adorable. She is spayed and has all of her shots and is a sweetheart. She is 8 weeks old and doing great.
The full cost of adoption has run me just under 500.00 that includes her toys/cat tree/adoption fees/food/supplies/I would do it again. I paid for her all her vaccines \ vet check \ identification chip \ and certified her health.
You cant go wrong everything is included in the cost of adoption. They also have adoption weekends when the building is over-run and a home has to be found for all the kittens\cats housed there.
Yes your worried about the welfare of one litter I can see how one can grow attached to a "Kitten" in the 12 weeks they have grown away from their fluffy demeanor and onwards towards "Mature Cats" one more month and they have the potential to have kittens of their own.
The draw is to adopt a young kitten i was very lucky and fortunate for both her and for me our paths crossed and now she will have a forever home.
Here you have someone who is responsible and wants to provide a home for one of the kittens and is denied that (At 10 weeks). The welfare of the kittens? Look at the devestating historical totals from 2015 or that doesnt matter?
I’m going to sound like Bob Barker but control the dog and cat population please have your pets spayed or neutered.
If your going to adopt out kittens then honestly it would also be in the best interest of having her mother spayed so more needless lives are potentially destroyed.
If your not planning on spaying then keep her as an "indoors only" kitty. I'm really hoping that you choose to be a responsible pet owner.
If you need to charge a cost for the kittens because you can’t afford to spay or neuter then it’s better to do that than have more animals be euthanized..
When was the last time you spent some time at the Humane society? I spent a little over 3 years volunteering and spending time with the attendees. It’s a rewarding and sad experience at the same time.
I will be slightly above $500.00 when all is said and done but im feeling great in knowing I saved a life. Don’t buy adopt but in this case it was the Edmonton Humane Society
Just my 2 cents worth.
Richard
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