Uncomfortable Silence...

I just got back from breathtaking Tofino, British-Columbia (Canada). My husband and I spent three nights there, but we saw and experienced so much it seems like we've been gone a least a week. This was our very first trip without the kids (since they were born, that is), and as much as we love them, it was fantastic to have this time to reconnect and enjoy each other's company without getting interrupted every few seconds! I feel recharged and energized! The highlights of our trip were:

-Hiking in the majestic rainforest filled with gigantic trees,
-Breathing in the freshness of the ocean, watching large crashing waves and fearless surfers,
-Observing a group of whales (Orcas) chasing dolphins just off the beach,
-Calling two curious seals that swam up to us,
-Enjoying delicious seafood,
-Relaxing at the spa in a mineral pool, getting facials and munching on tapas in our robes,
-Having a picnic on the driftwood in February!
-Finding seashells, a beautiful sand dollar, mussels, and crab carapaces on the beach,
-Climbing the rocks along the shore and exploring the pools of water left by the tide

I was really surprised to see how everything was so green there! Green grass, green leaves and ferns everywhere, and such mild weather compared to Edmonton! Was this really Canada in the middle of winter? I found myself surrounded by stillness and beauty everywhere. 

This trip made me realize that I have become more comfortable with silence. Silence between my husband and I, silence in my own head. I am experiencing a decrease in "mental noise" and my compulsive need to label everything I see and mentally narrate my experiences is diminishing. Before, if my husband and I were driving for many hours and long moments of silence happened, I felt unease, an unconscious discomfort, without really being able to identify what was the root of this low-grade tension (I would actually feel guilty at times for not filling in the blanks). Now, I'm more aware that it's ok to just allow the space, the silence to be. When Rob and I walked in the rainforest together, I didn't feel a need to say anything, to label this as a red cedar, that as dogwood. I just let the experience happen through me, through my senses, and let it go. I'm finally learning to keep that compulsive thinking mind in check and it's truly liberating! 

Like waves, thoughts arise continually in our minds. It's up to us to decide if we want to surf on this wave, or that wave. Maybe we just prefer to sit back and watch for awhile, it's much less exhausting than trying to catch every single wave that comes our way. Thank you Tofino for reminding me that I am the awareness behind the waves.

Warmly,

Lise
www.lisevilleneuve.com
Conscious Living Solutions (Facebook)