Complimentary Mindfulness & Emotional Awareness Resources to the First 100 Participants!

 

YouTube link with details here: https://youtu.be/lGAjkkmNfAk

Best,

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Breaking The Cycle of Anger (The Mindful Minute with Lise)

 Please see the above video (https://youtu.be/doSauPD3Oso)

This morning, my teenage daughter was angry, and some of that anger got projected on to me. It's hard not to get triggered when someone directs their anger at us, isn't it?

Anger is like a protective shell. It hides our vulnerable feelings like hurt and sadness. Remembering this can help us to respond with compassion, instead of reacting with more anger. When we create more anger, everybody suffers. 

When we let go of our own negative feelings - by experiencing them fully, we break the cycle of anger.

Peace,

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Mastering Your Mind: The Most Effective & Direct Path To A Happy, Empowered, Successful Life

 Mastering Your Mind: The Most Effective & Direct Path To A Happy, Empowered, Successful Life

She Made Me Angry! Really?

It can be truly shocking to realize that our mind is the ONLY obstacle to our inner peace, well being, happiness and success in life. If the majority of us fully understood this, we'd be living in a radically different world. Our current world reinforces the belief that things and people "out there" have power over us and they "make us feel" a certain way that keeps us trapped and powerless. But do things "out there" really have the power to "make us" feel anything without our consent? Let's explore this.

Believed Thoughts Change Your Body Chemistry

Happiness or unhappiness originate in the mind. It all starts with a thought, a story or a belief that we either accept as "truth" or reject. Every thought we believe - whether it's helpful or stressful, acts just like a hypnotizing spell. For every single thought believed, the body creates corresponding physical sensations of comfort or discomfort. A fearful thought will trigger contraction, tension, rigidity or loss of energy in the body. On the other hand, a loving thought will instantly create a state of harmony, flow and well being in the body. 

Physical Sensations Are Expressed Externally As Emotions, then Behaviors

When our body sensations of comfort or discomfort become very strong - sometimes overwhelming - we release this "energy in motion" (e-motion) as emotions that are always expressed externally via our body language. We may decide to act on these emotions with behaviors. Remember, a single thought that we believe triggers the following chain reaction: 

• Believed thought / Corresponding physical sensations of comfort or discomfort / Emotion / Behavior. 

Others Don't Have the Power to Make Us Feel Anything!

Without that prior conscious thought (or subconscious memory) that is assumed to be true, there can be no feelings, emotions or behaviors. If others can't control which thoughts we will accept or reject as untruthful - which will prevent the emotional chain reaction from happening, then we can logically conclude that others don't have the power to make us feel anything. Of course, mastering our mind is a skill that requires discipline, practice, self-awareness and knowledge.

Time For Accountability! Happiness or Unhappiness Originate in the Mind

Once we understand how our own brains and bodies work, we become fully accountable for the way we think, feel and act. Imagine if everyone became accountable this way! There would be no more blaming others for the way WE feel. We would no longer feel victimized or powerless about our state of mind, our rage, our depression or our anxiety. This is very good news! Our happiness or unhappiness originate in the mind, which means we've always had the power to control how we respond to all the unpredictable things life will continue to throw our way. Will we be able to gracefully accept "what is" in this moment? - which doesn't prevent us from taking action in the next moment, or will we believe resistant, angry, hopeless thoughts that argue with what has already happened? Stressful, resentful thoughts will raise our discomfort level, drain our energy and darken our mood. Will this help us to get what we want in the end?

Don't Underestimate the Power of Your Subconscious Mind!

Not only do our thoughts directly change how we feel and perceive the world, they also have enormous creative power in our lives. Maybe you've heard the accurate saying "thoughts become things"? There is a simple explanation for this. The thoughts we accept as true with our conscious mind become deep seated-beliefs that get stored in our subconscious mind. If only we realized the extent to which our subconscious programming is driving our actions, behaviors, beliefs and expectations! If only we could see the direct relationship between most of our life circumstances and what our subconscious has accepted as truth or facts! 

We Are Our Own Worst Enemies

Day by day, the negative, stressful thoughts we believe without questioning insidiously slip into our subconscious mind and then we wonder why we constantly sabotage ourselves and experience less than desirable outcomes. We are our own worst enemies because we constantly underestimate how incredibly powerful our mind is! Our negative self-talk is extremely toxic and destructive! It changes our body chemistry, our mood, our behaviors, and it may very well end up as a permanent program lodged in our subconscious that can impact us for life! 

If You Don't Believe Me, Try This...

Are our kids aware of the power of their thoughts and beliefs? Have they ever been educated about the constant mental chatter going on in their minds? Do they know that their thoughts are not facts, and most thoughts should not be believed? We truly have no idea how powerful our mind is! If we did, we would make a conscious effort to use it constructively and we would be blown away by the results. If you don't believe me, try reprogramming your subconscious with words like "joy, peace, vitality, health, wealth, success, love, harmony...etc." right before you fall asleep at night and immediately as you are waking up. Simply say these words to yourself for the next two weeks and see what happens! I dare you.

You've Had The Power All Along...

Once you master your own mind, you also master your body, your emotions, your perceptions, your (re)actions and you will have more control over many of your external circumstances that are largely influenced by your subconscious beliefs. If mastering your own mind is not the most effective, direct path to a happy, empowered, successful life, then what is? It's time to stop looking for answers "out there" and instead, look "in here".

How Can We Learn To Master Our Minds?

I believe this is THE most important thing we should be teaching our children (and ourselves). It's not that hard to learn, it just takes a little practice. I have written a complete manual for kids that teaches the following steps to self-mastery in a simple, gradual way through short stories and fun activities (Wise Willy's Secret Manual To Become a Mindful Superhero):

1) Become aware of your thoughts (mental chatter)

2) Become aware of your body sensations

3) Understand the relationship between thoughts, body sensations, emotions, behaviors and perception

4) Understand how your brain and body work (rational brain, emotional brain, emotions)

5) Develop self-awareness of your thoughts and feelings

6) Increase your tolerance for discomfort

7) Learn how to question your stressful thoughts, release uncomfortable feelings appropriately and self-regulate your moods.

8) Use your focus to harness the incredible power of your conscious and subconscious mind.

New Printable Mindfulness & Emotional Intelligence Cards!

I have recently created 40 printable mindfulness and emotional intelligence cards from Wise Willy's Secret Manual that are great reminders for daily practice. Thanks for taking the time to read!

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Wise Willy's Secret Manual Available Worldwide!

Wise Willy's Secret Manual Available Worldwide!

(See French Below) 

It's truly amazing what you can accomplish when you set clear, consistent, daily goals for yourself and you stay off Facebook! (because Facebook is a HUGE time-sucker!) Manifesting our goals is something we can all achieve. However, what I have learned over the years is that when we align ourselves with a higher power and say: "please show me how I can serve, how I can use my talents to create something for the greatest good", then the manifestation process becomes joyfully miraculous. Creativity then arises directly from the heart, in a detached, high-frequency, love-filled flow that guides our thoughts and actions.

In January 2021, I truly had no idea that Wise Willy's Secret Manual to Become a Mindful Superhero would emerge from this creative flow! My intentions were to polish up the Conscious Kids Program I had previously written and offer it in a new format. But someone unexpected stepped into my life: Wise Willy! I kept an open mind, went with it, and now his Secret Manual is available on Amazon worldwide. The entire process has been completely unpredictable, and it continues to be every day! I am in AWE.

Wise Willy truly has a mind of his own! He decided to release half of his book on YouTube, in video format. He also insisted on being his own Publisher in order to release his Secret Manual as soon as possible - even though his manual is still being reviewed by two major American Publishers at this time. He's a strong-willed little dude on a mission to help kids around the world develop their Superpowers! He brings out the inner-child in grow-ups and invites them to be playful, creative, authentic and spontaneous. 

I'm very grateful to have the opportunity to help Wise Willy get his Secret Manual "out there." Now I'm going to have to help him deal with his addiction to Facebook.

Thanks for reading!

Lise Villeneuve

www.wisewilly.com

Le manuel secret de Wise Willy est disponible dans le monde entier!

C'est vraiment incroyable ce qu'on peut accomplir lorsqu'on se fixe des objectifs quotidiens clairs et qu'on ne passe pas tout notre temps sur Facebook! La manifestation de nos objectifs est quelque chose que nous pouvons tous accomplir. Cependant, ce que j'ai appris au fil des ans, c'est que lorsque nous nous alignons à une puissance supérieure et nous disons: "s'il vous plaît, montrez-moi comment je peux servir, comment je peux utiliser mes talents pour créer quelque chose pour le plus grand bien", alors le processus de manifestation devient joyeusement miraculeux. La créativité naît alors directement du cœur, dans un flux à haute fréquence et rempli d'amour qui guide nos pensées et nos actions de façon détachée.

En janvier 2021, je n'avais vraiment aucune idée que le manuel secret de Wise Willy pour devenir un super-héros conscient émergerait de ce flux créatif! Mes intentions étaient de peaufiner le programme Enfants Lucides que j'avais précédemment écrit et de l'offrir dans un nouveau format. Mais quelqu'un d'inattendu est entré dans ma vie: Wise Willy! J'ai gardé l'esprit ouvert et maintenant son manuel secret est disponible sur Amazon dans le monde entier. Le processus a été complètement imprévisible et continue de l'être tous les jours! Je suis épatée!

Wise Willy est vraiment sa propre personne! Il a décidé de publier la moitié de son livre sur YouTube, au format vidéo. Il a également insisté pour être son propre éditeur afin de publier son manuel secret le plus rapidement possible - même si son manuel est encore en cours de révision par deux grands éditeurs américains en ce moment. C'est un petit mec têtu qui a pour mission d'aider les enfants du monde entier à développer leurs super pouvoirs! Il fait ressortir l'enfant intérieur chez les grands et les invite à être ludiques, créatifs, authentiques et spontanés.

Je suis très reconnaissante d'avoir l'opportunité d'aider Wise Willy avec son manuel secret. Maintenant, je vais devoir l'aider à gérer sa dépendance à Facebook!

Merci d'avoir lu!

 Lise Villeneuve

www.wisewilly.com

Perhaps I Fit Right In with the Radicals?

 

First of all, I'd like to extend a big warm, fuzzy HELLO, in alphabetical order, to...

Anna, (high five!)

Bruce, (hey chocolate-loving BFF!)

Guillaume, (chat va toi?)

Jenna, (yo girl!)

Kari, (hi, it's me again!)

Lucien, (je t'inclus même si Feedburner t'a refusé)

Nevena, (on va y arriver avec les médias sociaux!!)

Nicolle, (hey awesome cousin!)

Rachid, (salutations de l'Alberta!)

Rob, (hey stranger!)

Valérie (COUCOU ma belle!)

Yvon (the scale of consciousness...)

It feels truly WONDERFUL to write a blog knowing that someone will actually read it! This blogging platform (Blogger) is created by Google, you see, and ever since Google+ was cancelled, all the people who were following my blog automatically got removed, bringing my readers down to a big fat ZERO. How depressing is that?

This happened a while ago, I can't remember exactly when, and I was too discouraged to do anything about it. I didn't have the time or the energy to invest in troubleshooting this issue, and my blog didn't even have a "subscribe" button or a way for anyone to sign up for it. Despite all this, I kept on writing because I'm a blogger at heart, with or without readers. But boy oh boy, you have all given me a huge boost in motivation by signing up here. THANK YOU! 💝 

By the way, about a week ago, my daughter Emma and I did a photoshoot at home. Our cat Precious was VERY upset that we disturbed her nap on the couch! She is a little bipolar, but we love her anyway. And now, moving on to the subject of fitting in with the radicals...

Lately, I've really been thinking about the whole social media gimmick. Nevena, I think you summed it up beautifully in your latest email by saying: "il semble que les réseaux sociaux n'offrent que l'illusion de la connexion qui nous manque (personnelle, physique, spirituelle ou autre)." Translation: "It seems that social networks only offer the illusion of the connection we lack (personal, physical, spiritual or otherwise)". How true. The whole social media experience obviously doesn't compare to genuine in-person interactions, yet many of us feel this pressure and bittersweet desire to participate online. After all, we are social creatures wired for connection, so it makes sense to want to take whatever we can get!

There are obviously many benefits to social media, like staying in touch, gaining visibility, and let's not forget the "social voyeurism" that's part of the package, whether we like it or not. But how aware are we of the price we are paying by default when we use platforms such as Facebook and even Google. What's the cost? It's no secret that all our personal data is being collected and we are constantly being targeted by aggressive advertisers who track and record our online behaviours. As the documentary The Social Dilemma states, by using these platforms, "we ARE the product." We are nothing more than consumers being emotionally manipulated to spend as much as possible. It's truly a dilemma and everyone has to make their own informed choices based on what's most important to them. 

I recently decided to ditch all mainstream social media platforms and joined only one: MeWe. The design is very similar to Facebook, but they define themselves as "the social network built on trust, control and love." There are no ads, no spyware and no newsfeed manipulations. It's a lot less "happening" and busy than Facebook, and yes, this alternative platform has attracted some right-wing radicals, but this doesn't bother me because I don't plan on friending them or joining their groups. I think we can peacefully cohabit this cyberspace that includes people from all walks of life, cultures and belief systems. After all, we are all human beings just trying to do the best we can. 

It occurred to me recently that perhaps my pronounced interest in spirituality, consciousness and mindfulness makes me appear like a bit of a radical or an extremist to the mainstream masses? I'm OK with that! So far, I feel right at home on MeWe. It feels clean, fresh and genuine. I've had to dig a little, but I have discovered a few hidden gems already. Thanks so much for reading! Have a wonderful week!

Lise Villeneuve

Visit my website: www.lisevilleneuve.com

You can subscribe to my blog here:  https://www.lisevilleneuve.com/blog

Join me on MeWe: https://mewe.com/i/lisevilleneuve

I was Shocked To Discover This...

(La version française est disponible ci-bas)

When I was in the music business many years ago, I desperately wanted to produce and distribute an album. I sent my demos to record companies and did a lot of waiting and hoping. A couple big music producers made some promises (over dinner and wine) that never materialized. I wasn't willing to sell my soul (or other assets) to the music industry.

In 2003, I lucked out by winning first place at the Tremplin International de la Chanson Francophone in Paris (see picture above). The following year, I was touring 9 countries with my solo piano show even though I still didn't have an official, professionally produced music album! I got really tired of waiting, so I stopped telling myself that the task was unsurmountable and I rolled up my sleeves.

First, I incorporated my own company that became a small record label. This gave me access to grants, which I was lucky to receive from Musicaction. Then, I started to build a team of important collaborators: musicians, photographers, graphic artists, publicists, radio trackers and more. It was so satisfying to finally see things moving forward! 

Once the album was recorded, I had a strong urge to write a book, and I was confident I would have enough time to write it during the post-production phase of the CD. I wanted the album and the book to be released together, in one package. So, my small company also became a publishing house. I began to expand my team of collaborators with editors, printers, book distributors...etc. It was so exciting! The book industry was completely new to me. There was so much to learn and do.

A little while after I finished writing the first version of my book, I had a sudden realization. I was so close to the finish line, at last! After all those years of waiting, I had now achieved a major goal: an album and a book! Surely, this accomplishment would exterminate those nagging feelings of restlessness and unworthiness, right? 

What I realized was that for most of my life, I was working under the unconscious assumption that something I did or accomplished, could eliminate my uncomfortable feelings that kept resurfacing every now and then. Like many, I truly believed that "worldly success" was the key to feeling more peaceful and content. I became acutely aware of this thought pattern that had been motivating me for so long: "once I release this book and CD, I will be happier." I was truly shocked to discover how erroneous this belief was! 

With the gift of this new insight, I had to rewrite the entire book! I hadn't learned my lesson yet, and now I know that living and sharing the following message was the true purpose of my first book: "Enjoy the journey, it's much more important than the final destination you are trying to reach. Don't assume that something in the future will make you feel better than the way you feel right now. Find the joy of being in the moment, and this will bring true power to whatever it is you are doing."

Now that I am working on my second book (Conscious Kids), you can bet that I am applying what I learned! What are you working on right now? Are you able to find joy in the moment? What particular circumstances trigger uncomfortable feelings? Being aware of these gives you the power to make changes.

Thanks for reading!

Lise Villeneuve 

You can subscribe to my blog here: https://lisevilleneuve.blogspot.com/ (top of page on desktop version)

Quand j'étais dans le secteur de la musique il y a plusieurs années, je voulais désespérément produire et distribuer un album. J'ai envoyé mes démos à des maisons de disques et j'ai beaucoup attendu et espéré. Quelques grands producteurs de disques ont fait des promesses qui ne se sont jamais concrétisées. Je n'étais pas intéressée à vendre mon âme (ou d'autres actifs) à l'industrie de la musique.

En 2003, j'ai eu beaucoup de chance. J'ai remporté la première place au Tremplin International de la Chanson Francophone à Paris (voir photo ci-dessus). L'année suivante, je faisais une tournée dans 9 pays avec mon spectacle de piano solo, même si je n'avais toujours pas d'album de musique officiel. J'étais vraiment fatiguée d'attendre, alors j'ai arrêté de me dire que la tâche était insurmontable et j'ai retroussé mes manches.

Tout d'abord, j'ai créé ma propre compagnie qui est devenue une petite maison de disques. Cela m'a donné accès à des subventions, que j'ai eu la chance de recevoir de Musicaction. Ensuite, j'ai commencé à rassembler une équipe de collaborateurs importants: musiciens, photographes, graphistes, publicistes, trackers radio et plus. C'était tellement satisfaisant de voir enfin les choses avancer!

Une fois l'album enregistré, j'avais une forte envie d'écrire un livre, et j'étais convaincue que j'aurais assez de temps pour l'écrire pendant la phase de post-production du disque. Je voulais que l'album et le livre soient publiés ensemble, dans un seul paquet. Ainsi, ma petite entreprise est également devenue une maison d'édition. J'ai commencé à élargir mon équipe de collaborateurs avec des éditeurs, des imprimeurs, des distributeurs de livres, etc. C'était tellement stimulant! L'industrie du livre était complètement nouvelle pour moi. Il y avait tant à apprendre et à faire.

Peu de temps après avoir fini d'écrire la première version de mon livre, j'ai eu une prise de conscience soudaine. J'étais si proche de la ligne d'arrivée, enfin! Après toutes ces années d'attente, j'avais maintenant atteint un objectif majeur: un album et un livre! Certes, cet accomplissement exterminerait mes sentiments persistants d'agitation et d'indignité, n'est-ce pas?

Ce que j'ai réalisé, c'est que pendant presque toute ma vie, j'opérais sous la croyance inconsciente que des accomplissements quelconques pouvaient éliminer les sentiments inconfortables qui ne cessaient de refaire surface en moi. Comme beaucoup, je croyais vraiment que le succès matériel était la clé pour se sentir plus paisible et satisfait. J'ai pris pleinement conscience de ce schéma de pensée qui me motivait depuis si longtemps: « une fois que je terminerai ce livre et ce disque, je serai plus heureuse ! » C'était choquant d'avoir la réalisation que ma croyance était totalement erronée.

Avec la clarté de cette nouvelle vision, j'ai dû réécrire tout le livre! Je n'avais pas encore appris ma leçon, et je sais maintenant que de vivre et de partager le message suivant était le véritable objectif de mon premier livre: "Profitez du voyage, c'est beaucoup plus important que la destination finale que vous essayez d'atteindre. Ne prenez pas pour acquis que quelque chose dans le futur vous permettra de vous sentir mieux que ce que vous ressentez maintenant. Trouvez la joie d'être dans l'instant présent, et cela apportera un véritable pouvoir à tout ce que vous faites."

Maintenant que je travaille sur mon deuxième livre (Conscious Kids / Enfants Lucides), vous pouvez parier que j'applique ce que j'ai appris! Sur quoi travaillez-vous actuellement? Êtes-vous capable de trouver de la joie dans l'instant présent? Quelles circonstances particulières déclenchent des sentiments inconfortables? Prendre conscience de cela vous donne le pouvoir d'apporter des changements.

Merci d'avoir pris le temps de lire!

Lise Villeneuve

Vous pouvez vous abonner à mon blogue ici: https://lisevilleneuve.blogspot.com/ (en haut de page sur la version desktop)

I Wanted to Shout at Eckhart Tolle...

 Waking Up: Personal Insights From my Journey

I Wanted to Shout at Eckhart Tolle...

How are you? I recently took a break from blogging and social media because quite frankly, I felt a little drained. Facebook especially can suck the life out of me in no time. So I focused on doing things that recharged my energy, such as spending more time in nature, reading inspirational books, and I spent a lot of quality time with those guys in the picture: my family. Now I feel great, and I have some news I'd like to share with you!

This Fall, I took an online course with Eckhart Tolle. During the course, someone from Greece asked him "how can I help kids to become more conscious?" In short, he replied that the best way to teach kids about mindfulness and emotional literacy is through short stories and little activities. He went on to say that if anyone in our group had some talent for writing, this would be a wonderful project to develop for children. You can image my reaction! I wanted to shout at my computer screen to tell Eckhart "I've created that exact project already!", but unfortunately, he couldn't hear me. Bummer.

Nevertheless, hearing him say that - coupled with my frustration at not being able to share Conscious Kids with families in person anymore (Covid) - made me want to create a more tangible version of this collection of stories and activities. Currently, Conscious Kids is only available online as a downloadable file, which is fine, but I know it could be packaged in a way that is absolutely delicious for families. So, shortly after Eckhart's "pep talk", I decided to send my Conscious Kids book proposal to one American Publisher I particularly respect. Two weeks after I sent it, the Publisher got in touch with me and said that my proposal was being passed on to be reviewed by their Children's Books Editor! I was thrilled and am so eager to hear back from them.

Experts in the book industry say that authors have a 99.9% chance of being rejected by Publishers, but regardless of what happens with this particular Publisher, I am committed to moving forward with a bold new version of Conscious Kids, even if that means self-publication. I can already picture its pages filled with vivid and colourful illustrations. I think kids will really love that!

Conscious Kids would never have been possible without all the support and feedback I have received over the years from you, my community. Thank you for that. I look forward to the journey ahead, and if you'd like to share your ideas, suggestions or comments about bringing this new version of Conscious Kids to life, please do get in touch with me, I'd love to hear from you. In fact, over the next few months, I will be actively asking you for feedback about what your best version of Conscious Kids would look like. Together, I know that we will be able to make this happen for our children.

Thanks for your presence,

Lise Villeneuve

Creator of Conscious Kids

Why do We Feel So Disconnected Despite Social Media?

Why do We Feel So Disconnected Despite Social Media?

"We are social creatures. We need one another to survive. That's partly why we so strongly gravitate to social technologies like Facebook and Instragram: social media allows us to come together to share ideas and love, regardless of location. But this comes at a cost." 

-David and Austin Perlmutter, M.D., Brain Wash.

I think many of us underestimate how truly disconnected we are from ourselves and from others these days - despite being "connected" online for an average of 142 minutes per day! (Digital Information World, January 4, 2019, www.digitalinformationworld.com). How do we really feel after we've done our daily dose of social media duty? Less lonely, more fulfilled, inspired and genuinely connected to others? Remember how you felt the last time you went out for coffee with a friend, or did something in person with someone you enjoy spending time with. How does that feeling compare to what you experienced after logging out of Facebook or Instagram today?

(In the digital world) "we cannot really touch one another, smell one another, detect facial expressions or moods, and so on. Real bonding is more biological than psychological and requires physical contact. The emotional entanglement of real friendship produces oxytocin and endorphins in the brains and bodies of friends - cementing them together in ways that are more profound than other relationships."

-Stephen Asma, The Emotional Mind

Of course, social media offers many benefits and most of us still interact with other humans on a daily basis, but I think we need to remind ourselves that one of the things we are searching for via social media - genuine and meaningful human connections - simply can't be found online. More than ever, we need to spend quality time with each other in person. Our brains are wired for real, human interactions and our mental health will be jeopardized if we cut ourselves off from this basic need. I think many of us can already feel this sense of empty disconnection. Think about our younger generations for one minute. This is their "normal." How scary is that? At least some of us older folks remember what life felt like before the social media craze. Has it added meaning and joy to our lives, or does it impede our ability to live to the fullest?

"The simple art of behavioral cues that we pick up in person when someone is leaning into our conversation, blushing at a comment, or even shifting in her seat is all lost when we rely solely on technological exchanges. We encode our memories through our senses: the smell of the grass when we had our fist kiss, the comfort from a warm cup of hot chocolate, or even the familiar sounds of the birds from your childhood home are all sensory inputs that bring us front and center to an emotional space we encode into a permanent memory. As we fall into this digital world and learn to live without these emotional connections, we lose part of what makes us social beings interconnected through humanity, grace and, and love. "

-Dr. Lisa Strohman, Psychologist and expert in technology wellness

I am as guilty as anyone for spending too much time on social media. However, the emptiness I feel after using Facebook is allowing me to appreciate my in-person connections at a whole new level. I clearly see how much sharing space with others is so vital for my well-being, my sense of belonging and my general outlook on life. I feel extremely grateful to have the opportunity to share deep and meaningful conversations with the lovely new friends I meet on a regular basis at the Himalayan Meditation Centre where I teach mindfulness and meditation.

In this compassionate and non-judgmental space, masks come off, hearts open, tears flow freely, hugs are given. As we sit together and share our individual concerns, we see that we are not alone. We see that others are carrying the same fears and burdens as we are, and this brings tremendous relief. We laugh together, we support each other, we listen to each other and we grow together. There is so much healing love there! This is the power of community. Many of us don't know each other well at all, some of us have just met, yet we experience this heartfelt connection with each other, and that's all that matters. What a gift. I am so grateful to have this safe and joyful space that allows me to fully be myself without feeling judged. I think everyone needs that.

Here's the good news: we can use social media to find our tribe! Find your community, express your true self fearlessly and heal your heart in a safe and sacred space where you will feel supported and connected to others. It's more important than ever to do this! Reach out and change lives, starting with your own! It feels amazing.

Kind regards,

Lise Villeneuve
www.lisevilleneuve.com

5 Life Hacks I Secretly Experienced in Cuba

Photo credit: Yvon Loiselle

I was recently in Holguin, Cuba, with a small group. I left Edmonton feeling tired, stressed and in need of some serious physical rejuvenation. I returned home after one week in Cuba feeling like a kid on Christmas morning! It's been over three weeks since my return and I can still feel the positive effects from this trip of a lifetime!

What was it about this trip that made it so special? I've been to Cuba many times before and have travelled all over the world, but there was something uniquely different and refreshing about my recent experience in Holguin. It's no mystery actually. This trip was extraordinary because of the wonderful, spontaneous, crazy, hilarious, generous, brilliant friends I was so fortunate to travel with. The chemistry in our group was deliciously electrifying! Every day was a sweet fiesta, and I have to mention that nobody in our group drank alcohol -except for me, I like the occasional cold cerveza.

I had SO much fun, and I also had realizations that deepened the sense of peace and contentment I still feel from this unforgettable trip. Charles, Catherine, Yvon, Nadia...here are the five life hacks I secretly experienced in Cuba:

Number 5:
I really enjoyed our little stretching and mindfulness sessions by the beach, but my experience was that mindfulness doesn't have to be done formally to be effective. It can be your little secret. During the entire trip, I was practising mindfulness for a few minutes here and there. I felt deep gratitude every time I saw a bird, a flower, a butterfly, the gorgeous ocean or when the breeze caressed my skin. I'm sure you all did too, right? I mean, it was difficult NOT to find a reason to be grateful in this paradise. It may sound silly to even mention, because gratitude comes so naturally when we immerse ourselves in something different and special. The trick is to keep it up every day, especially when we are back in our routines at home, because an attitude of gratitude radically changes our perception, alters our brain and enhances our mood. Now that I have experienced the sublime power of gratitude in Cuba, I am reminded to keep practising it at home. After more than three weeks, I still feel like I'm on fire (in a good way, not talking about inflammation here :)

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Photo credit: Catherine Kubash

Here's another little secret. Every time I walked down that cobblestone path that led to the beach, I breathed deeply, one step at a time. I felt the heat under my bare feet, and I noticed what I was feeling and thinking. Nobody had to know I was doing a "micro-meditation," I was simply bringing my awareness into my body in the present moment. I also did this while snorkeling, eating and floating in the pool. Back at home, I do this while I'm doing the dishes, gardening, walking...etc. No need to sit quietly on a cushion in a dark room. Life offers endless opportunities to practice mindfulness in a way that is integrated to our everyday activities. I think it's even more effective this way.

Photo credit: Lise Villeneuve

Number 4:
It was my experience that taking good care of the body (regular movement, eating well, sweating a lot and drinking gallons of water) allowed me to really feel grounded in my physical vessel. It may sound obvious, but sometimes I have a tendency to be more in my head and less in touch with the body. This very embodied awareness I felt in Cuba made it easier for me to physically feel and release any passing emotions that wanted to arise. As a result of this practice of letting go of old emotional "stuff", the mind quickly became a lot quieter and peaceful. I remember just sitting on the beach one morning, feeling overwhelmed by this strong wave of gratitude. I felt the emotion move through me and it spontaneously moved out as tears. There was no hesitation or resistance. I felt absolute peace. At home, I am reminded of the importance of daily physical movement to feel fully grounded in my body. This really does make a huge difference in our physical and emotional well being.

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Number 3:
I realized that from this place of grounded presence in my own body, it became a lot easier to remain aware of the stressful thoughts that inevitably came up now and then. In a state of embodied awareness, I found that it was much easier to question the validity of my stressful thoughts and, more importantly, to be able to notice the immediate negative impact these thoughts had on my body (contraction, heaviness, rigidity, lethargy). The connection between thoughts, the body and emotions became crystal clear to me and any emotional tension could be spontaneously released through this awareness. The result of this was a lot more energy because emotions were not being repressed or suppressed in the body. At home, I am reminded to question my thinking anytime I start to feel physical tension or contraction.

Number 2:
Hanging out with this bunch of clowns in Cuba, I was reminded that no matter how mature or refined we think we are, we are all children at heart. We should give ourselves permission to sing, dance, play, laugh our butts off and enjoy life. Every. Single. Day. Not just on special occasions. Once we start allowing ourselves to shamelessly express our joy again (like we spontaneously did when we were little), we realize how naturally intoxicating it feels to be fully alive! Why the heck do we cut ourselves off from our own passion and playfulness? Yvon, Nadia, Catherine, Charles: you could give seminars on how to unleash the inner-child. I laughed so hard it hurt. At home, I am reminded to live joyfully from the heart, to follow my creative impulses (no matter how embarrassing that may look), and to seek the company of people who are not afraid to live fiercely and freely.

Photo credit: Yvon Loiselle

Number 1:
To quote one of my very favourite authors, Dr. David Hawkins: "Nothing in the universe happens by chance or accident. The universe is a coherent concurrence and interaction of innumerable conditions attendant on the infinite number of energy patterns."

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

Photo credit: Charles Tanguay

I believe everything we experience serves our evolution. Everyone we meet is our teacher and our mirror. I don't think we have as much control over "our" life as we think we do, so we might as well enjoy the ride! Worrying is a waste of time anyway. All this to say that this experience was perfect in every way. Catherine, Charles, Yvon, Nadia: is it just me, or do you also feel like this trip was meant to be? I feel like my heart was broken wide open. Gratitude, gratitude, gratitude. A quand le prochain voyage?

Warmly,

Lise Villeneuve
Mindfulness Teacher
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Sleep, My Darling...

Sleep, My Darling...

If only we could see

How blind we are

If only we could know

How truly kind we are...

If only we could be

The ocean of peace

 That rests

Beneath the restless mind

Beneath 

Our thousand painful scars

If only we could see

Just what we are,

If only we were willing 

To heal those wretched scars

If only we could see

The Love beaming

From our radiant heart

Like a fire

Brighter 

Than a thousand stars

If only we could trust

That all is well

If only we could know

That all is One

We could peek through that rigid crust

Far beyond the ego's shell

Beyond the walls of our personal hell

If only we could see

That all is One

If only we could know

That all is well

Perhaps we could awaken...

Awaken from the spell

Until then,

Sleep, my darling...

Sleep well

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

The ONE Thing To Know...

-Mindfulness Bites-

Mindfulness or Mindlessness?

By Lise Villeneuve

If you asked me to share just one simple mindfulness concept with you, this would be it. What I’m about to explain is so basic and so simple, yet it has the potential to completely transform your life by freeing you from so much unnecessary suffering. Are you ready to hear it? First, imagine you had an app or a device that could automatically track, identify and record every single one of your thoughts (I know it’s just a matter of time before such a thing exists!) How many thoughts do you think you would approximately have each day? Scientists tell us we think an average of 50,000 to 70,000 thoughts per day -that’s 35 to 48 thoughts per minute! They also estimate that about 80% of our thoughts are mostly negative. Imagine if we had such an app that tracked all our mental chatter. What do you think we would learn from closely monitoring our thoughts?

Can we control our thoughts?

First, I think the vast majority of us would be amazed at how truly unaware we are of our thoughts. We would be so surprised to review all the things we’ve been telling ourselves in a day: all the little stories we cling to, the judgements, the fears, the beliefs, the assumptions, as well as our hopes, dreams and positive thoughts. It would be quite an eye-opener to see the contents of our minds in one day, but I think what would shock us the most would be the realization that our thoughts are so random and extremely repetitive. We would eventually come to the conclusion that despite what we may believe, we have very little control over our thoughts. If you don’t believe me, sit quietly for five minutes and observe your mental chatter. Can you control it?

Can we control our emotions?

What do you think is the second major thing we would learn from using a device that could instantly show us our thoughts? We would see that what we think directly influences how we feel. Our thoughts generate emotions, and in turn, our emotions give rise to more thoughts, then round and round the cycle goes. If our device showed us we were stuck in negative thinking patterns, then we would immediately make the connection between our dark thoughts and our bad mood, or our discomfort. But here’s the kicker: negative thinking patterns don’t just include self-critical thoughts. They include any thoughts that argue with reality. You know, the thoughts we have that resist what is, the thoughts that fight against what has already happened. The shoulds and shouldn’t haves of our minds. We all have them.

I can't believe she did that...

If our app could clearly show us the thoughts that fight with what is, we would immediately understand how much stress they cause us. “She should or shouldn’t have said that.” We would see how such thoughts - regardless if they are true or not - completely rob us of our natural state of peace and well being. We would notice how much energy we waste by clinging to these thoughts and stories that end up making us feel miserable. With the extra awareness and clarity provided by our device, we could look at any one of our thoughts that argue with what is, such as “He should or shouldn’t have done that” and we could then ask ourselves “when I cling to this thought, how does it make me feel?” What does that feel like in my body? Try it now. Think of a recent situation when you felt irritated, frustrated, sad or angry. What were you telling yourself? How did that make you feel?

After having identified the type of stress, discomfort and resistance created in your body from having focused on that particular thought or story, the next logical step would be to ask: “How would I feel - who would I be - if I didn’t have that thought, or if it never came to my mind?” Again, it doesn’t matter if the thought or story are true, justified or not. How would you feel if you simply didn’t entertain that thought?

Does positive thinking work?

Of course if it weren’t for our neurotic minds, we would all be in a permanent state of bliss. Our challenge is to end the war with our minds, to accept what is - including our compulsive thoughts and our mental stories. And how can we do this? By meeting our fearful, jealous, angry, depressed and resistant thoughts with understanding and compassion. Simply pushing our negative thoughts away or replacing them with positive thoughts doesn’t work. That’s like a band-aid solution: it’s superficial and it prevents us from deeply healing our psychological wounds. We all carry these wounds. Here’s the good news: our negativity can be a blessing because it shows us the parts of ourselves that need our attention, care and compassion. So we have two choices. We can either remain attached to our thoughts and stories and consequently have to deal with the suffering they cause us, or we can sincerely investigate them, learn what they are trying to teach us about ourselves and grow. Mindfulness teaches us how to do this inquiry. It encourages us to become lovers of what is. This is the most direct path to inner peace and freedom.

Putting up with people's B.S.

Investigating our stressful thoughts - especially recurrent thoughts like the ones that make us feel confused, frustrated, sad, angry or any other negative emotion, doesn’t mean we have to put up with people’s B.S. It doesn’t mean we can’t act or initiate change, and it doesn’t invalidate our feelings or our experiences. Sometimes we falsely believe that by holding on to anger, resentments or worry, we remain in control, or we teach others a lesson. But what really happens is that we block off our own energy by holding on to this toxic negativity. Questioning our stressful thoughts doesn’t mean we have to take all the blame, admit defeat or let others walk all over us. So what is the purpose of inquiry?

A person or situation can't make us feel anything

Inquiry simply bring us back to a state of peace, calm and clarity by examining the direct connection between what we are telling ourselves and what we are feeling. It’s never a situation or a person that make us feel anything. It’s always our thoughts about the situation or the person. This is excellent news, because we have the ability to question our thoughts, to meet them with understanding and to become more aware of their power over us. Questioning our thinking helps us release those negative emotions that hold us down, it removes confusion and it gives us peace of mind. It is from this new place of clarity that the best solutions to our problems and conflicts naturally arise. We can now take action without being angry, sad, confused or fearful.

3 questions that will change your life...

We may not have an app to help us track our thoughts yet, but that’s OK, because we have our negative emotions to help us out. They are like our alarm signal that lets us know it’s time to question our thoughts. It’s time for inquiry: what am I thinking right now? (specifically identify your stressful thought, write it down if you can) How do I feel when I think that? (identify your emotions and notice where you feel any body sensations) How would I feel if I didn’t have that thought? (specifically describe how you think you would feel) These questions might seem obvious or simplistic and you might be tempted to just dismiss them, but if you try them out, you will immediately understand their value. These questions were inspired by The Work of Byron Katie. There are a few more steps we can take to get the most out of inquiry, but for now, focusing on these three questions is more than enough.

Bring on the negative thoughts...

There is no need to try and stop, change or eliminate our negative thoughts, because they are our teachers. They show us the patterns that hold us back and keep us trapped in suffering. All that is required is to notice our thoughts, to meet them with compassion and to allow, welcome and release the emotions they stir up. That, my friends is what I wanted to share with you. Inquiry will truly set you free.

Sincerely,

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com

Mindfulness: the Cult

-Mindfulness Bites-

Mindfulness: the Cult

By Lise Villeneuve

What exactly is mindfulness anyway? I’ve attempted to explain it many times to family members who are very religious and somehow, they think mindfulness IS Buddhism, or (gasp!) some kind of satanic New Age cult. Therefore, in their eyes, I am headed straight to hell for practising such heresy. But don’t worry, we’re still one big, loving family. Our gatherings are always very lively and stimulating, there is never a dull moment!

But seriously, mindfulness has nothing to do with religion or even New Age fads. In fact, mindfulness is much closer to psychology than religion. By the way, in case you’re wondering, despite my upbringing, I’m not religious at all -in the sense that I don’t participate in any particular rituals from any specific faith. However, I consider myself very spiritual and I do strongly believe in a divine creator or Higher Power, to avoid the label “God.” So whether you’re religious or not, it’s all good, there is no conflict, no contradiction between mindfulness and religion.

What is it? I would say it’s the art of being aware, of paying attention. Paying attention not only to what’s happening in our external world, but, more importantly, to what’s going on in our inner world. Mindfulness develops our emotional intelligence. It’s kind of like the instruction manual we were never given at birth that helps us figure out the relationship between our thoughts, our emotions and our bodily sensations.

I’m not quite sure why this seems to threaten my religious family. Perhaps it’s the meditation aspect of mindfulness that makes them uncomfortable. Meditation makes me uncomfortable too, especially when I have to sit in the same pose for a long time and my legs start to cramp up, but I guess that’s a different kind of discomfort. Meditation is simply a way of quieting the mind and being still. Mindfulness encourages us to practice noticing our thoughts and our feelings so that we can become less reactive, less controlled by them. It empowers us to make wiser decisions with a clear mind.

Why has mindfulness become so incredibly popular over the last few years? Probably because of its many scientifically-proven benefits. Such as? Well I’m glad you asked. There are so many benefits that I decided to incorporate them into a little rap song. I’d like to dedicate it to certain members of my family (all in good humour):

When you feel like a mess, like a big ball of stress

You can always rely on mindfulness

Take a deep breath, fill up your chest

Mindfulness will help you feel your best

Notice your thoughts, notice how you feel

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness keeps your brain real sharp

It helps your memory and it’s good for your heart

It lowers your blood pressure, brings down your stress

It helps with depression, it helps with distress

Notice your thoughts, notice how you feel

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

It improves your focus and boosts resilience

It makes you feel good so you can show off your brilliance

Improve your health and your self-compassion

With mindfulness: It’s the latest fashion

Notice your thoughts, notice how you feel

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness will help you keep it real

Mindfulness helps in so many ways

It’s like “miracle whip”, you know, the mayonnaise?

It gives life some flavour, it gives it some punch

It helps you cope when you’re in a crunch

Mindfulness really fills your cup

So if it’s a cult, then where do I sign up?

Mindfulness really fills your cup

So if it’s a cult, then where do I sign up?

Thanks for reading, and for more detailed information about the benefits of mindfulness check out this link: https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/benefits-of-mindfulness/
(Mindfulness decreases stress and anxiety levels, improves emotion regulation, induces a state of relaxation, which in turn improves higher brain functioning, increases immune function, lowers blood pressure and heart rate, increases awareness, attention, clarity and focus, it accelerates recovery of the body, decreases depressive symptoms, increases self-compassion, improves general health, decreases reactivity, increases curiosity, tolerance, patience and self-acceptance, it improves academic performance, it’s a buffer against bullying and depression, it boosts resilience, reduces behavior and attention problems in children, improves job performance in the workplace, decreases burnout, and it primes our brain for  better learning and remembering.)

Sincerely,

Lise Villeneuve
www.lisevilleneuve.com

Breathe Baby, Breathe

-Mindfulness Bites-

Breathe Baby, Breathe

By Lise Villeneuve

On the day I was born, July 20th, nineteen-never-mind-the decade, I refused to breathe. Just ask my dad. The doctors tried smacking my tiny bottom to make me cry and breathe, but apparently I didn’t mind the spanking. After a little while longer, the medical team became nervous and one of the nurses tried this new technique she had apparently seen on t.v. She blew on me. I don’t know if it was the unpleasant aroma of her breath that startled me out of baby bliss, but it worked. I cried my little heart out and took my very first inhalation of air on this Earth. Don’t worry, the pace of this story will pick up and I won’t bore you with every little detail of my life. Luckily, I’ve forgotten most of it anyway.

All this to say that ever since I was born, it seems as though breathing never really came naturally to me - unless someone blew on me, but thankfully that hasn’t happened since my birth, or at least I don’t remember. I was always a shallow breather. Perhaps this is one of the reasons why I was drawn to singing later in my teens. It forced me to breathe deeply, at least when I was on stage. My singing teacher would tell me he thought I was asthmatic. That was no compliment in the singing world, but I got over it. I’m a survivor.

Luckily I learned how to breathe properly when I was singing, but nobody ever told me that it would be incredibly beneficial to keep breathing deeply during the rest of the time - which was about 96 % of my life. That’s a crying shame because I missed out on the numerous benefits of deep breathing. Here are just a few: deep breathing is a natural painkiller, it reduces stress and anxiety and relaxes the body and mind, it improves blood flow, reduces inflammation in the body, improves digestion, detoxifies the body, stimulates the lymphatic system, increases energy, it improves lung and heart function, improves focus and even memory. Wow! That’s quite the list, and if you don’t believe me, here’s a great article by Ben Fishel that lists 21 benefits of deep breathing backed by scientific studies.

How much would we be willing to pay for a pill that would give us all these positive effects? Bottom line is deep breathing instantly improves our physical, emotional and mental well being, and it’s completely free! So why didn’t I know this earlier?

I must have known it intuitively. Come to think of it, maybe my great love of snorkeling has something to do with giving myself a chance to practice deep belly breathing. When my face is in the water and I look down at that mysterious world of colourful sea life, all I hear is the sound of my slow, controlled, deep breathing - in and out of the snorkel. Swoosh, Swish. Swoosh, Swish. Perhaps one of the reasons snorkeling feels so good is a result of that rush of oxygen I get. It’s an instant feel-good buzz. I suppose I could have saved a small fortune by simply learning how to breathe properly instead of having to fly to the Caribbean each year to oxygenate my brain while snorkeling. Oh well, it was fun.

Well they say you end up teaching what you most needed to learn yourself. It’s no surprise, then, that I now teach mindfulness, which includes deep belly breathing. Watch out, here comes the teacher in me. As you keep reading, take a deep breath through your nose and let your belly fill up and expand just like when you’ve eaten too much and have what my teen calls a “food baby.” Unfortunately, sexiness is not an immediate benefit of practising deep belly breathing, however, by becoming more relaxed, healthier, more focused and in a better mood, you certainly will become sexier by default.

OK. Back to deep breathing. Inhale through your nose, expand your belly, then exhale slowly out of your mouth. That’s it. You now know the secret to an improved life. Seriously, continue to breathe like this and notice how it instantly changes the way you feel. Imagine if we all breathed like this 24/7! There would likely be no need for drugs or alcohol. Mind you, the occasional glass of red wine with a side of deep belly breathing is a pretty healthy combo. So cheers to that!

Lise Villeneuve

www.lisevilleneuve.com